


The Christmas Swap

by three_days_late



Category: One Piece
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Bisexual Vinsmoke Sanji, Christmas, Closeted Character, Established Relationship, F/F, F/M, Fake/Pretend Relationship, M/M, side Vinsmoke Brothers/OCs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-12
Updated: 2019-01-23
Packaged: 2019-09-16 22:27:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 37,733
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16962642
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/three_days_late/pseuds/three_days_late
Summary: Sanji's mom expects him to bring his girlfriend over for Christmas, which would be fine, except Sanji actually has a boyfriend. His sister, who is in a similar situation, suggests they simply swap partners for the holiday. What could possibly go wrong?





	1. A Sticky Situation

**Author's Note:**

> I've been writing this on and off since like last Christmas, but I still have Doubts that I'll finish it in time for this Christmas. So I figured if I started posting it before Christmas, maybe people will still care about it after Christmas.

Sanji stepped out of his restaurant into the freezing cold. As it started snowing, he shivered, tightening his coat as he lit a cigarette and made his way down the street. Yet another dinner rush at the Baratie was successfully completed, and he couldn't wait to get home out of the cold and warm up.

About two feet away from the door, his phone started ringing. He cursed and dug his hand into his pocket, rolling his eyes when he saw the name. He tugged at his glove with his teeth until his thumb was free enough to slide across the screen and answer the call, "Yeah?"

"Good evening, Sanji," his sister said, "I hope you're enjoying the weather."

"What do you want, Reiju?" he grumbled into the phone as he fixed his glove.

"I called to talk to you about Christmas. Are you still coming for the weekend?"

"Yeah," he said with a sigh. He hated it, hated spending any amount of time with his so-called family, but his mom was always excited to see the whole family together, and however much he hated the rest of them, he loved her, so every year he went. And every year it was terrible, "I'll be there, but I won't like it."

"Good," she said, "Mom will be happy to see you. And your girlfriend."

Sanji stopped in the middle of the sidewalk, "My what?"

"Oh, did I forget to mention?" Reiju laughed, "Mom found out that you moved in with someone earlier this year. She was so excited when I talked to her, going on about how all of her babies have found love and that the house was going to be so crowded this year."

Sanji felt the bottom of his stomach drop out as he stood there, shivering but no longer feeling the cold as dread spread through him, colder than any ice, "Do, do they know, does  _she_  know…?"

"Don't worry," Reiju said, her voice warm and comforting to the storm currently raging inside him, "I told you, she thinks you moved in with your girlfriend. She doesn't know you actually moved in with your boyfriend."

Relief spiked through his chest as he started walking again, "Well shit, why does she think that?"

"You did tell her that you moved, and apparently your Facebook posts led her to believe that you're in a relationship. She just put two and two together."

"Ah," Sanji stopped at a crosswalk and tapped his foot, "So, what, she's expecting me to bring a girl to Christmas?"

"Yes, pretty much," the light turned and Sanji crossed the street as she continued, "She's expecting each of us to show up with a date."

"Are you telling me Ichiji, Niji,  _and_ Yonji all have girlfriends?" he shook his head, "Who are these most unfortunate women?"

"You'll meet them in a few weeks," she reminded him.

The line went quiet for a moment. Sanji mentally went back through their conversation, trying to figure out what his sister was implying with her silence, "Wait, shit, does mom know about you and Pudding?"

"No," she said, "But, like you, she did find out that I was seeing someone, and now assumes I have a boyfriend."

"Who she is expecting you to bring to Christmas too," he rubbed a hand down his face, "Shit, this is such a mess. Maybe I just won't come this year."

"Oh?" he could hear his sister smirk, "You don't have a lady friend that can pretend to be your Christmas date?"

"Not any that don't already have other Christmas plans, or other Christmas dates. Plus I don't, really want to do that to Zoro," he blushed a little, then said, "What, you've got a guy already lined up?"

"I do not," she admitted, but Sanji knew that tone in her voice. His sister might not be as terrible as his brothers, but she could be plenty devious when she wanted to, "But, if you and Zoro are on board, I do have a plan."

* * *

Zoro was sitting on the couch watching TV when Sanji entered the apartment.

"Hey," he said as Sanji dusted the snowflakes out of hair, "Are you up for cooking tonight or do you want to go out?"

Sanji kicked off his boots and hung up his jacket, "Do you want to spend Christmas with me?"

Zoro frowned and looked over at him, "What?"

He took a deep breath and walked over to the couch, "Christmas, do you want to spend it with me or not?"

Zoro turned off the TV, "Is everything okay?"

He scowled and crossed his arms, "Why wouldn't it be?"

"Because I asked you about dinner and you asked me about Christmas?"

He rolled his eyes, "I just spent all day cooking so I'm not up for it right now, and I don't really want to go back out in the snow."

"Fine," Zoro pulled out his phone, "We're ordering Chinese."

"Fine," he sat down on the couch, "But order it from the good place downtown, not the shitty one on the corner."

"It'll take twice as long to get here and cost twice as much," Zoro grumbled as he dialed, "But whatever."

After the call was placed, Zoro turned to Sanji, "So, what's up with Christmas?"

Sanji crossed his arms in front of his chest and sunk into the couch, "If you don't want to spend Christmas with me that's fine."

"I do," Sanji looked over at him as he heart fluttered in his chest. Zoro was blushing, just a little, but he pushed on, "I want to spend Christmas with you."

"You don't even like Christmas," Sanji said as he uncrossed his arms, letting them fall to his sides, "It's both too religious and too commercialized, two of your least favorite things. Are you sure?"

"Yeah," Zoro reached over and touched his hand, "I don't like the holiday, but I like you, and when you're around things are just, better, I guess," he ran his thumb over the back of his knuckles and smirked, "Two terrible things must cancel each other out."

"You ass," Sanji shoved his shoulder and turned his hand so he was properly holding Zoro's.

"So yes, I would like to spend Christmas with you," he squeezed his hand and continued, "But don't you usually go to the Vinsmokes' for Christmas? Are you not going this year?"

"No, I am."

"So, what," Zoro looked confused, and Sanji all but held his breath, "you want me to go there with you?"

Sanji tightened his grip on Zoro's hand, "Is that going to be a problem?"

"Not for me, no," Zoro's brow furrowed, "But are you okay with them knowing about, you know," he gestured at the space between them, "This?"

His grip on Zoro's hand tightened further as he clenched his other hand into a fist on his knee, his fingernails biting his palms, "No."

Zoro raised an eyebrow, "Then why the fuck do you want me to come with you?"

Sanji let go of his hand and pulled a cigarette out of his pocket. He lit it and took a long drag, exhaling the smoke away from Zoro before he spoke again, "So, my mom found out I'm seeing someone."

"Oh," he leaned forward and tried to catch Sanji's eye, but Sanji was staring fixedly at the wall, "How did she take the whole dating a guy thing?"

"She didn't," he took another drag from his cigarette, "She, thinks I have a girlfriend? She's kind of expecting me to bring her to Christmas."

"Oh," Zoro leaned back and drummed his fingers on the arm of the couch, "So what, are you planning on trying to pass me off as a girl? Or come out to your family in one fell swoop?"

"Neither," Sanji knocked the ash off the end of his cigarette into the ashtray on the table.

"So why the hell do you want me to come with you?"

Sanji bit his lip as he looked over at him, "You can say no, if you want. I won't, get mad or be offended or anything. You can spend Christmas with Luffy or Nami or whatever you usually do and I can just, say my girlfriend had other plans or something. It's not a big deal."

Zoro's eyes narrowed, "What is it?"

He took another deep drag from his cigarette before speaking, "My sister's in the same boat as me. Mom found out she's seeing someone and expects her to bring her boyfriend when she really has a girlfriend. She had the idea that we could just, switch partners for Christmas."

Sanji clenched his knees in a death grip as the silence between them grew. Heat spread from his cheeks all the way to the tips of his ears and he could feel himself turn even redder by the second. It was a stupid idea, Zoro would never go for it. Who would? What kind of decent person would agree to date their partner's sister, even without the condition of watching their partner date someone else?

"You're both idiots," Zoro said as he leaned back and crossed his arms over his chest, "You don't even like the Vinsmokes, why do you care if they find out?"

"Reiju cares. I don't care, not really," he gripped his arm and looked away, "Judge basically disowned me years ago, so it's not like being bisexual and dating a guy is going to make things worse between us. My brothers already hate me, and while this could certainly make them hate more, there isn't much they'll do about it. But with my mom it's different," he ran a hand through his hair and clenched it tightly, "I can't, I don't know how she'll react."

"If she really loves you, then she'll love you no matter what."

"Part of me knows that. Part of me is just, she's the only one in that house who ever gave two shits about me," he looked up at Zoro, eyes wide, shaking slightly, "I don't want her to hate me too."

A beat, then Zoro leaned forward and pulled Sanji into a hug, "Fine, I'll do it."

Sanji blinked, relaxing almost instantly, "You will?"

"Yeah," he sighed and leaned his head against Sanji's, "I still think it's a dumb idea, but it'll be nice to actually spend Christmas with you. Although I should warn you, I'm terrible at playing straight."

Sanji chuckled and leaned further into the hug, wrapping his arms around Zoro's torso, "Thank you."

They stayed like that for a moment before Zoro spoke again, "This is going to be a terrible weekend, isn't it?"

Sanji chuckled into his chest, "The worst."

* * *

"Wow," Nami said from her spot on his bed, "I can't believe you're actually going to meet the infamous Vinsmokes."

"Yeah," Zoro said, tossing some socks into his overnight bag. He had no idea why she was here. He may have asked her what were some appropriate things to wear when meeting your boyfriend's super rich ex-family while pretending to be dating his sister and from there ended up telling her the whole scheme, but he certainly didn't need her to actually come over for this.

"How do you feel about that? Excited? Nervous?" she leaned back on his pillows as he ducked his head into his closet, "Ooh, what are you bringing them? You have to bring them something, you're meeting the family on Christmas."

"Sanji said not to bother," he said, pulling out his two nicest shirts and wondered if they would work, "There's nothing I could get them that they would accept or appreciate."

"Not even wine? Everyone appreciates wine. It's a great first impression gift."

"They own like five different vineyards and have their own wine brand that sells for $1500 a bottle. The last thing they'd want is the $15 bottle I'd get them," Zoro said as he showed her the shirts, "Are these okay?"

"Depends," she scooted forward until she was sitting on the edge of his bed, "What does this weekend entail?"

"Dunno," he shrugged, "At least two dinners, some Christmas Eve party or something, whatever usually happens on Christmas Day, and Sanji said something about a Winter Festival that they go to every year?"

Nami studied the shirts with the utmost scrutiny, "Bring the green one, wear it to one of the dinners. Bring a suit for the party."

He tossed the blue shirt back in the closet and carefully folded the green one, "I don't  _have_  a suit."

"Don't worry about it," she waved her hand, "I'm sure Sanji has one for you just in case."

He peeked over at Sanji's half of the closet, at all the suits and shirts that were neatly pressed and stored with the utmost precision and frowned. Sanji was strong, but he was slim, not nearly as built as Zoro was. There was no way in hell any of Sanji's suits would be able to fit him, "Whatever," he said, placing the shirt in his bag.

"If that Winter Festival thing is outside, you're going to want to wear a sweater," she continued, falling back onto his bed, "Or a nice jacket. Something that's not a hoodie to keep you warm."

"What's wrong with hoodies?" he grumbled. She sat up on her elbows and gave him a look, which made no sense to him, "Hoodies are great! They're comfortable and warm. Suddenly the Vinsomkes are too good for hoodies? Well fuck them!" He tossed a hoodie into his bag to demonstrate his point, "I don't give a shit about what they think. Neither does Sanji."

"Yeah, I'm sure," Nami rolled her eyes, "That's exactly why he's trying to pass you both off as straight for a weekend."

He glared down at his bag, "Well, I don't care."

"And that's exactly why you agreed. Because you don't care."

He crossed his arms and looked away, "I don't care. I don't know why I agreed to this."

"You agreed because Sanji asked you too, and you want Sanji to be happy," she smirked at him, "because you love him."

He tossed the hoodie from his bag at her face, "Shut up." Even if it was true, she didn't have to say it like that.

She caught it and tossed it aside before standing up and walking to his closet to dig through it herself, "You said yes because you want to spend Christmas with Sanji, because you love him."

Zoro stared at the floor, not dignifying her statement with a comment, but clearly not denying it either.

Because the truth was he did care. Not about the Vinsmokes or their opinions, but about Sanji, a lot more than he was willing to admit. And if Sanji and Reiju weren't ready to come out to the Vinsmokes then Zoro wasn't going to be the asshole who forced them to. He just didn't get why they were willing to go through such theatrics to keep the secret. Zoro was never one to shy away from who he was, and being gay was part of that. Maybe it was because he didn't care what most people thought about him in general, but hiding a part of yourself like that had always seemed so pointless and not nearly worth the effort. But it wasn't his secret, and it wasn't his family.

Somehow Nami managed to produce a sweater that Zoro didn't realize he had. She tossed it at him and he was gratified to notice that it didn't have any holes in it. Score.

"You also probably want to meet the Vinsmokes, and see if they're as terrible as Sanji says they are," she shrugged as she sat back down on the bed.

He placed the sweater on top of his bag and smoothed it out a bit, blatantly not looking at his friend as he said, "I guess, part of me just wants to know where he came from. And I know it's not good," he sighed, "I know he doesn't like that part of his life. But part of me still wants to know."

"Because you love him," her smirk grew.

"Whatever," he said, once again not denying it.

"I've never met Sanji's brothers," Nami continued, rolling her feet across the carpet, "but I've met his sister a few times."

Reiju was supposed to be his girlfriend, but the truth was he knew nothing about her other than she was Sanji's sister, "What's she like?"

"She was nice enough. A bit closed off," Nami frowned, searching for the right word, "Very secretive," she looked back up at him and smiled, "You two would actually get along great, but your conversations would be dull as shit."

He threw a balled up shirt at her, "Shut up. No one asked you to be here."

"But I came anyway, because I care," she said, tossing the shirt back at him, "Pack that, wear it to one of the dinners."

He muttered his dissent, but did what she asked.

"I met his mom once too."

"Really?" That was interesting. Out of all the Vinsmokes, Sanji talked about her the most, and it was clear that despite his issues with the rest of his family, he held a lot of love and respect for his mother, "When? How? Was she-" he stopped himself, unable to find the right words to ask what he wanted to know.

"A few years ago," she smiled, leaning back and kicking her feet again, "back when Sanji had that huge crush on me and would give me all my meals at the Baratie for free."

"He still gives you all your meals for free," he rolled his eyes.

"Anyway, I was hanging out there one day and she came in to see him," she shrugged, like meeting Sanji's mom was an everyday occurrence and not a huge fucking deal, "Apparently she used to come and see him and Zeff there a few times a month, before she got too sick."

Zoro stared at his bag, fiddling with the end of the zipper, "What was she like?"

"She was nice," he looked over and saw her smiling at him, "She reminded me a lot of Sanji, actually. It was easy to see why he loves her so much."

He nodded as he looked back at his bag. Was she enough like Sanji that she was only really nice to women? He was going as her only daughter's boyfriend, so would she hold him to a higher standard? What would he do if she didn't like him?

"But, you don't care about that," Nami teased, raising her eyebrow, "Right?"

"Yeah," he nodded again as he went back to his packing.

At the end of the day, he supposed it didn't matter.

* * *

Sanji and Zoro were pulled into the rest stop parking lot, Sanji anxiously pacing around the car while Zoro sat on the hood and tried to ignore him.

"They're late," Sanji needlessly said as he lit up his fourth cigarette with the dying embers of his third.

"They probably got lost," Zoro scoffed as he leaned back against the windshield, "How lame."

"You're the last person who can judge people for getting lost."

Before Zoro could deliver his devastating comeback, a pink convertible pulled into the lot, and out came a woman with pink hair wearing a pink, skin tight dress.

"Hello Sanji," she smiled, "Did you have trouble finding the place?"

Sanji rolled his eyes, "We're not the ones who were late."

Zoro jumped off the car, straightened up, and looked at her, "So, you're Reiju?"

"Yes," she held out her hand, "Reiju Vinsmoke, your date for this weekend."

Zoro grunted and shook her hand, "Zoro Roronoa," he gave her a quick glance over, and noticed her doing the same with him. She was conventionally attractive if a bit on the skinny side, and had the same distinctive swirl to her eyebrow that Sanji had but going the opposite way, making him wonder if that was a family thing. She was also much pinker than any girl Zoro had ever met, "Is pink like your theme color or something?"

She chuckled, "When you grow up with quadruplets for younger brothers, you carve out a niche where you can."

"Yes, yes, wonderful," Sanji said with wave of his arms, "Can we get going already?"

"We've only just met up again after so long," Reiju said, "We should spend some more time together, don't you think?"

"We'll be spending plenty of time together this weekend," he grumbled and crossed his arms, "And we're already running late."

She smiled, "So eager to see everyone again, little brother?"

"The quicker we get there the quicker we can get this over with and go," Sanji said with a huff as he glanced towards Reiju's car, "Where's Pudding?"

Reiju looked at it as well, "Pudding, let's go."

A young woman with brown hair tied up in pigtails stepped out of the car. She approached with a few graceful steps until she was standing in front of Sanji. Slowly, she lifted her head, her bangs falling elegantly away from her bright brown eyes as she smiled up at him, "Hello Sanji, it's nice to see you again."

Sanji's cheeks turned pink as a blush spread across his cheeks, "Y-yeah, nice to see you, Pudding."

"Wait," Zoro frowned, "You know each other?"

"Her family and ours are business partners," Reiju explained, "Growing up they were close friends," she leaned against his shoulder and whispered in his ear, "Between you and me, she always had a bit of a crush on him."

Zoro's eyes narrowed as Pudding gently touched Sanji's arm, "And, you're okay with her pretending to date him?"

"Okay isn't the right word for it," Reiju pursed and tapped her lips, "Intrigued is closer. In case you are wondering, Sanji did used to have a crush on her, but he got over it."

Sanji's cheeks grew even redder as he laughed at something Pudding was saying, leaning ever so slightly into her touch, "Are you sure about that?"

"Pretty sure," she shrugged, "He's the one who broke up with her, after all."

Well that was something Sanji  _completely failed to mention_  when proposing this stupid scheme. Zoro didn't know whether to be shocked, mad, or disappointed, so he settled for saying "What."

"Oh?" Reiju said with a smile, "You didn't know?" She wrapped her arm around his, "This is going to be a fun weekend."

"Right," Sanji cleared his throat and stepped away from Pudding, "We should get going," he unlocked his car and opened the passenger door, "After you."

"Why thank you," Pudding smiled at him, shooting a look over her shoulder at Zoro and Reiju before she stepped into the car and he closed the door.

Sanji took a deep breath and turned around to face them. He at least had enough sense to look sheepish, unable to meet Zoro's eyes as he focused on Reiju, "So, we'll just," he gestured at his car. His eyes caught their still interlocked arms briefly and he looked away once more, "See you at the house."

He got in his car and drove off.

"Well, new boyfriend," Zoro glared as Reiju smiled at him, "Shall we get going too?"

They'd been on the road for about ten minutes in almost complete silence. Zoro fiddled with his phone, once more considering texting Sanji to demand an explanation and once more realizing that since he was driving Pudding would probably be the one to read and answer it, and that was the last thing he wanted right now. Instead he glared at his phone, as if staring at Sanji's name in his contacts would somehow express his feelings to the man himself.

"What's your favorite color?" Reiju asked suddenly.

Zoro looked up at her, "Huh?"

"We're supposed to be dating," she said, eyes still on the road, "We should get to know each other before the big show, right?"

She was right, he still agreed to do this, so he should at least make an effort to get to know his fake girlfriend, "Green."

"That explains the hair," she said with a laugh, "Mine's pink, by the way."

"Yeah," he glanced around the interior of the car, which was just as decked out in pink as the outside and the woman driving it, "I figured."

"What's your favorite animal?"

"Tiger," he paused, then added a tentative, "What about you?"

She hummed, then answered, "Moths."

"Wasn't the answer I was expecting."

"They're unassuming, and most people consider them pests, but they can be just as beautiful as butterflies, and even deadly, in some cases," she glanced over at him, "Why do you like tigers?"

"Dunno. I like an animal that can rip a man's heart out, but there's also something graceful, I guess, about how they hunt," he shrugged and sunk further into the seat, stretching his legs under the dashboard, "I just think they're cool, I guess."

Reiju chuckled, "See? We are learning about each other," she returned her focus to the road and asked, "So how did you and Sanji meet?"

"Through a mutual friend."

"Oh?" she raised an eyebrow, small smile lighting up her face, "Was it love at first sight?"

"Hardly," Zoro rolled his eyes. He could still remember his first impression of Sanji when Luffy introduced him, just another skinny love-sick rich kid who was trying way to hard that he could probably snap like a twig, but she didn't need to know all those details, "I thought he was annoying, and I'm pretty sure he straight up hated me."

"How'd you start dating then?"

"We had the same group of friends, so we were constantly hanging out," he looked out the window as he recalled the spattering of study groups, dumb parties, late night video game sessions, and friendly gatherings that led them from rivals to friends and eventually to lovers. To Reiju he said, "Sometime after college we realized we had a mutual attraction thing going on, so we decided to try dating."

"I see," she said, "I'm glad Sanji has such good friends."

Zoro grunted in response before asking, "So, how did you and Pudding go from childhood friends to girlfriends?"

"We were never really friends growing up, she was more attached to Sanji," she said with a shrug, "I work as a lawyer for my father's company. A few years ago, my father planned a merger with Pudding's mother's company, Big Mom Sweets."

"Wait," Zoro turned to face her, "Is Pudding's mom  _the_  Big Mom? The lady who's on like every bag of candy in the store?"

"That's the one," Reiju smiled, "Linlin Charlotte is head of one of the biggest sweet distributors in the country. Pudding is their head chocolatier."

Zoro frowned as he turned back to the window. How the hell was he supposed to compete for Sanji's affection against a chocolate heiress? Not that this was a competition or Sanji some kind of prize. And even if it was, Zoro never lost.

"I was part of the legal team that worked on the merger," Reiju continued, "Pudding was one of the liaisons we dealt with. The two of us met on almost a daily basis to talk business, but when the merger fell through, we decided to keep seeing each other. Eventually that turned into a relationship."

"Oh," Zoro leaned back in his seat, "That's not very romantic either."

Reiju giggled, "It can be, depending on your perspective. But, neither of those stories will work for our first meeting."

"It doesn't matter," Zoro closed his eyes and stretched out more, "Just say whatever and I'll go with it."

"Do you do a lot of improv?"

"Not really," he shrugged, "But I am a go with the flow kind of guy."

"I see," she said, smiling, "This  _is_ going to be a fun weekend."

* * *

Sanji pulled up the long driveway and into the side area reserved for guests. The huge house loomed over them as he took a few calming breaths.

"Are you okay?" Pudding asked him, worry written all over her face.

Sanji beamed at her, "Of course."

"It must be hard," she said, leaning over to touch his arm, "Coming back to this house that you hate."

"Not really, I do it every year," he said, shrugging off her touch and getting out of the car.

Shit, he'd hoped that since she was dating Reiju Pudding had gotten over this, but apparently not. Unless she was only acting like this to mess with him, or to mess with Reiju. Or maybe Reiju told her to act this way to mess with him, honestly he wouldn't put it past either of them. They were made for each other.

Still, this was going to make this already awkward situation even worse. At least he has Zoro with him this year, for as long as Zoro agreed to put up with the bullshit his family came up with.

He ran a hand over his face. Inviting your boyfriend over for the holidays was supposed to be a sign that you were getting serious, that he was important to you and you wanted to include him in these kinds of rituals. Instead this might break them up.

He started feeling queasy. Sanji leaned back against his car and looked around, noticing the green motorcycle, blue truck, and red sports car already parked beside him. He felt even queasier.

Pudding hopped out of the car and closed the door behind her. She came around and grabbed his elbow, looping their arms together, and smiled, "Shall we get going?"

Sanji swallowed, putting on his best smile, and pat her hand, "Yes, let's go."

Arm in arm with his sister's girlfriend, Sanji walked straight into the lion's den.


	2. Meet the Vinsmokes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sanji deals with being home once again, and Zoro finally gets to meet the Vinsmokes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here's part two! I want to thank you all for your wonderful comments and kudos! Your encouragement means a lot to me, and I'll respond to the comments as soon as I come up for air. 
> 
> A quick note about the Girlfriends: their names and appearances are based off of three similarly colored ladies in another series I like, but I need to stress that their personalities are Not.
> 
>  **Edit 9/12/2019:** I figured out how to make IOS messages appear in fics, so after playing around a bit, I managed to make the group chat segments in this chapter actually look like group chats. Hit show creator's style if you wanna see it, and let me know if it actually works or if it's too distracting.

"May I present, Master Sanji and Miss Charlotte," the Vinsmoke family butler said as he opened the door to one of the sitting rooms.

"Thanks, Jean," Sanji said as Jean turned his nose up at him and abruptly walked out of the room. He never did like Sanji.

"Well well well, look what the cat dragged in," Sanji's attention was directed at the other occupants of the room.

Ichiji was sitting in an armchair on the left side of the room reading a book. He glanced up when Jean had opened the door, but returned to it once he saw it was only Sanji. Sitting next to him was a woman with flaming red hair tied back in a high ponytail. Her eyes were calm as she sipped her drink, observing the rest of the room.

Niji was in the center of the room on the couch. He was the one who greeted Sanji, and his grin now was sharklike, malicious and showing off all his teeth, and Sanji was instantly on edge. His arm was around the shoulders of a woman with long flowing blue hair, who smiled serenely at the entering couple.

Off to the right on the smaller couch was Yonji. Like Ichiji he also hadn't acknowledged Sanji's arrival, but that was mostly because his lip were fused to the green haired woman next to him. Her hair was done up in two buns, and after hearing the door open, she opened her eyes and pushed at Yonji's shoulder.

"Babe," she said, prying her mouth away from his, "Someone's here."

Yonji grunted as he turned around, eyes narrowing as he spotted Sanji in the doorway, "Oh, it's just Sanji."

"Oh? The mysterious third brother?" she grinned and pushed Yonji all the way off, "Introduce us, Babe."

"Whatever," he rolled his eyes and wrapped his arm around her shoulders, "Sanji, this is my girlfriend, Fiona Hyrill, youngest daughter of the Hyrill Family, known far and wide as one of the biggest automotive distributors. Fiona, this is the family fuck-up, Sanji."

"Hey," she leaned into Yonji's touch and smiled, "It's nice to meet you. I've heard next to nothing about you."

Sanji's eyes traveled up her long legs wrapped in skintight pants, stopping to rest at her breasts, wrapped in an equally tight shirt. Pudding nudged him none to gently in the ribs and his eyes snapped up to her face. Fiona's eyes were full of mirth, as if she knew exactly where his eyes and mind had lingered, and her smile took a more seductive turn.

His face went red as he looked away, "Y-yeah, same."

Fiona chuckled as Yonji turned her head and began kissing her again, with more fervor than before.

"Sanji," he glanced over at Niji who held his girlfriend a little closer, her head resting on his shoulder, "So glad you could make it home for the holidays."

"And with Pudding," Ichiji added without glancing up from his book, "Father always thought you were an appropriate match."

Sanji ground his teeth, itching to tell them both just what he thought of their opinions loudly and with several curse words, but instead he let Pudding's touch on his arm ground him, and said, "And who are these lovely ladies that you managed to trick into thinking you're actual human beings?"

"Forgive my rudeness," Niji laughed as he gestured at his girlfriend, "This is Nina Labrinna, the only daughter of Nathaniel Labrinna, the world renowned philanthropist and entrepreneur. Nina, my brother Sanji and his girlfriend, Pudding Charlotte."

"Oh, it's a pleasure to meet you," Nina smiled as she played with a lock of her hair, "I've always wanted to see all four Vinsmoke brothers in one room," she gasped, "And now I have! Oh, you really do all have the same face! It's like seeing four different colored Niji's!"

"Far be it for me to disagree with such a beautiful lady," Sanji said, "but if I saw Niji's face every time I looked in a mirror I'd have gouged my eyes out a long time ago."

"The day I look like Sanji is the day is the day I run away from home and join the circus," Niji smirked, "or worse, a kitchen."

Sanji's eyebrow twitched.

"Oh please," the woman in the armchair scoffed, "You're identical quadruplets, you're bound to look similar. Stop being so facetious about it."

"This is Danielle Holodriecht," Ichiji said, "The oldest daughter and heir to the Holodriecht Corporation. Dani, Sanji and Pudding Charlotte, head chocolatier of and one of the heirs to Big Mom Sweets."

"Pleasure," Dani said with a nod.

"Oh wow, you're one of those Charlottes?" Nina said as she sat up, "I didn't realize! I love Big Mom's Sweets, and you make the chocolate? That's so exciting! Making chocolate all the time must be so fun!"

"Yes," Pudding smiled and nodded, "It's a delight."

"Oh, here," she pat the seat beside her, "Let's be best friends!"

Pudding let go of Sanji's arm and sat down next to her. Sanji made a detour by the bar to pour two glasses of wine, downed one, then quickly refilled it before joining her. He handed one of the glasses to Pudding, who thanked him before returning to her conversation with Nina.

"So Sanji," Dani leaned on the armrest to talk to him, "What exactly do you do for the Germa Group? Ichiji never said."

"Ah, well," Sanji tapped his wine glass, "That's because I don't work for the Germa Group."

"Sanji works as a cook," Ichiji said.

Niji laughed as he leaned around his girlfriend to add, "Yeah, he left home to strike it big on his own, and he just ended up in some kitchen!"

"I am a chef," Sanji said, glaring at Niji, "A high class chef."

"Could have been making millions if you stayed home and did what you were told," Niji said, "Instead you're stuck cooking for other people."

Sanji ground his teeth and glanced at the clock on the wall. He'd only been here for a few minutes and he already wanted to grab Zoro and leave. Except Zoro and Reiju weren't even here yet. They should have been right behind them, where were they?

"A self made man," Dani's comment brought his attention back to her. She tapped her finger against her ruby red lips, "I can respect that. Where do you work?"

"At this little restaurant by the coast called the Baratie," he said as he took a sip of his wine.

"I've heard of that restaurant. It's supposed to be a very fine dining establishment, and the food is exquisite. You must do good work to receive such high praise."

"Thank you," Sanji said with a genuine smile.

"No matter how high class the restaurant is, you're still serving others," Ichiji said.

Before Sanji could respond, Jean opened the door to the sitting room and said, "May I present, Miss Reiju and Mr. Roronoa."

"Sorry we're late," Reiju said, "I'm afraid we lost our way."

The room went silent. Yonji and Fiona separated as Niji sat up straighter and Ichiji closed his book; the temperature in the room felt like it dropped a few degrees. Sanji downed half his glass of wine in one go and Zoro did his best to glare down the three brothers simultaneously.

After a few tense moments, Ichiji stood and held out his hand, "I'm Ichiji Vinsmoke. It's nice to meet you."

Zoro gave the hand a suspicious look but shook it all the same, "Zoro Roronoa."

"My brothers, Niji and Yonji," he said, and each of them nodded in turn, "And Sanji, I guess."

Sanji waved and took another sip of wine, "Yeah, nice to finally meet you."

Zoro glared. Sanji gave him the best shit eating grin he could muster.

"It's, not everyday we meet our sister's boyfriend," Ichiji said, "Where has she been hiding you?"

"Can't a girl have a private life?" Reiju said with a smile as she touched Zoro's arm. Sanji's eyes narrowed at the touch, and he looked away as she continued, "Why don't you have a seat while I get us something to drink?"

"Yeah," Yonji and Fiona shifted down to make room for him on their couch, "Sit down. Let's get to know each other."

Zoro gave Sanji a look, but he just shrugged as Zoro made his way over to the couch and sat down.

"So, Zoro," Niji said as he leaned forward, resting his forearms on his knees, "What does your family do?"

"Whatever they want, I guess," he said as Reiju came over and handed him a drink before sitting down next to him, "I don't really keep tabs on them."

Sanji laughed into his wine glass.

"I mean, what industry?" he tried again.

Zoro shrugged as he took a sip from his drink, "Does it matter?"

The awkward silence that followed was broken by Jean's re-entrance.

"Dinner is served," he said, leaving the door open for them as he left.

As the others filed out, Sanji hung back, and was glad to see Zoro did too. When they were alone, Sanji playfully hip-checked him and said, "Glad you finally made it."

"Those back roads are so winding, it's a wonder anyone can find their way here," he muttered, stepping away from him, "Your sister was the one driving and she kept getting turned around."

"Yeah, she's terrible with directions," he said, taking a sip of his wine, "You guys are made for each other."

"Man, shut up," he muttered, shoving his hands in his pockets as he stalked out into the foyer. Sanji followed him at a relaxed pace, "Why do your brothers seem to like, instantly hate me?"

"Because they're absolutely terrible," he took another sip of wine, "Also you're the first boy Reiju's brought home. They're sizing you up."

"What the fuck, I'm not even her boy," he sighed and rubbed at his hair, "Why would that even matter?"

"They're just being protective of their big sister. How else would you expect them to react?"

"Like she's a grown ass woman who can make her own choices," he took a sip from his drink, "'Cause she is."

Sanji shrugged, "Like I said, terrible."

"Speaking of terrible, when were you going to tell me about you and Pudding?"

He balked, blinking at him. What the hell did Reiju tell him? "What about me and Pudding?"

But before he could respond they'd arrived at the dining room and were being beckoned in by Jean. They both entered and sat down next to their respective dates.

* * *

The general chatter in the dining room ended with Judge's entrance. Sanji rarely if ever talked about the Vinsmokes, and when he did he almost never mentioned his birth father. All Zoro knew about the man was that Sanji hated him, so if nothing else he was interested in sizing him up for himself.

Judge was a rather large man, easily taking command of the room with just his presence. He smiled at his sons and greeted their dates warmly. As he made his way around the table, he completely passed over Sanji and instead offered Pudding a brief kiss on her cheek. When he made his way over to Reiju and Zoro, Reiju stood up, nudging at Zoro to do the same.

Judge gave his daughter a brief hug and a hello before he pulled away and sized up Zoro. After a brief stare down, he held out his hand and said, "It's Zolo, right?"

"Zoro," he corrected as he shook his hand. Judge squeezed it hard, but it was going to take more than an extra firm handshake to intimidate him, "It's nice to meet you."

Judge grunted as he let go of his hand, giving him one last look over before he made his way to the head of the table.

Zoro couldn't get a good read off of him, but he got the distinct feeling that he didn't like him. Well, that was fine. Zoro was never too concerned with people liking him, and he couldn't care less about the Vinsmokes' opinion of him.

Judge sat down at the seat at the head of the table as Jean re-entered with a bow.

"Mistress Sora should be here in a few minutes," he said, "Shall we start without her?"

"Of course," he said, tucking his napkin in, "She knows what time dinner is."

Jean nodded and signaled for the rest of the house staff to bring out the food.

Judge wasted no time and immediately started eating. When Zoro grabbed his utensils to do the same, Reiju nudged him just under his ribs and nodded at the rest of the table.

No one else had started eating. Dani had picked up her drink, and Nina was playing with her utensils, but hadn't touched anything on their plates. Across the table from him, Sanji had a dark look on his face that he usually had right before he kicked someones face in directed right at Judge.

Zoro sat back and put his hands in his lap.

Judge began talking with his sons about their business and their girlfriends about their families. Zoro wasn't really listening and tuned it all out, more focused on Sanji's fists clenched on the table. Pudding reached over and placed her hand over his, and he relaxed almost immediately. Zoro scoffed and looked away, feeling his own fists clench in response.

After a few minutes, Jean re-entered the dining room and announced, "Mistress Sora has arrived."

Sanji's mom looked a lot like him. She was a bit shorter than her son, thinner, paler, and her eyebrows lacked the distinctive swirl her children's had, but she had the same flowing blonde hair, the same bright blue eyes, and the same soft smile that Sanji always wore so well. A maid was at her side, gripping her arm as they walked to the table, and he noticed how much she was leaning on her just to make those few steps.

The closest to her, Sanji stood up and walked over to her, gently taking her arm from the maid as he leaned over and kissed her cheek, "How are you feeling?"

"Just fine," she wrapped her arms around him and pulled him into a hug, "I'm so glad you made it, Sanji. It's wonderful to see you."

Sanji wrapped his arms around her and hugged back, "It's great to see you too."

As they pulled apart, the brothers stood and walked over to their mother. Ichiji got there first, leaning down and kissing her cheek.

"Oh," she reached up and pulled him into a hug, "Ichiji, you always work so hard. It's so good of you to take some time off for us."

"Of course, Mom," he said as she pulled away and turned to Niji.

"Niji," she hugged him too, and he hugged her back carefully, "It's always a delight to see you. You're taking care of yourself, right?"

"Yes, Mom," he replied.

She pulled away and turned to Yonji, "My baby boy," she said as she hugged him too, "Did you get even bigger since the last time I saw you?"

"Probably," he grinned, hugging her back and lifting her off the floor a little before gently placing her back down.

By this time Reiju had stood up as well. She approached her mother with a serene smile and greeted, "Hello, Mom."

"Reiju," she said as she hugged her tight. Reiju stiffened, raising an arm and wrapping it loosely around her shoulder, "Thank you for coming."

"Of course," she said as they both let go.

Reiju carefully took her mother's arm and guided her to her seat at the table as the others sat back down. Once everyone was seated, they finally started eating the food, and Zoro wasted no time in digging right on in.

"We have so many new faces around the table this year," Sora said as a maid brought out a bowl of almost clear looking soup and placed it in front of her, "And some familiar ones as well. It's always a joy to see you, Pudding."

Pudding beamed at her, "It's a pleasure to see you too, Mrs. Vinsmoke, as always."

 _As always_ , she said, as if to rub it in his face in particular and taunt him with how close she already was with the rest of the family, with how long she and Sanji had known each other. Zoro knew he was being a little ridiculous, she was just being polite, but he still bit into his carrots moodily as Sora smiled back.

"Dani, Nina," she turned her attention to them, "It's wonderful that you could make it."

"It's truly a delight to be invited, Mrs. Vinsmoke," Dani replied, a soft smile gracing her face, "My father sends his regards."

"Oh, yes," Nina added, "Daddy and Mommy say hello as well!"

"Do they? How nice," she smiled. Zoro noticed that at the other end of the table, Judge was eating his food with a fiery glare in his eyes. His outward appearance was calm enough as he talked to Ichiji, but Zoro always had a sixth sense about these things, and he could feel him fuming underneath it all.

"I look forward to seeing them all at the party tomorrow," she turned her attention down the table, "And, it's Fiona, isn't it?"

"Fiona Hyrill, yes," she smiled.

"Oh!" Sora's eyes went wide and her smile grew, "I know your mother, don't I?"

Fiona perked up, "Yes!"

"We were good friends back in grammar school. I knew her well," she sighed wistfully, "I hope she's doing well."

"Yes, of course. She spoke very highly of you too," she grinned, "After Yonji and I started dating she told me so much about you, I feel like we're friends already."

"That's wonderful," she laughed, light and airy, not like Sanji's laugh at all, but it held the same mirth and delight his did, "It's a shame she can't make it to the party tomorrow."

"Yes, she and my father are very sorry they'll be unable to attend."

"A pity," she glanced across the table at her husband, who looked away, "But how strange the world works! After all these years you'd end up with Yonji."

"Yeah," she playfully bumped Yonji's shoulder, "We met backstage at a concert. I didn't even realize who he was until we went out for drinks later."

"I see," her smile softened a little, "You are very much like your mother. I think we'll get along great."

Fiona beamed as Zoro shifted uncomfortably in his seat. All these people were already so well acquainted and here he was, just an outsider trying to butt in. He wasn't even really dating Reiju, didn't even care about their opinion of him, but he was starting to feel self-conscious and awkward. He glanced between Sora and Sanji, noticing the soft look on his face whenever he met his mother's eyes, and felt his anxiety grow.

"And, Zoro, right?" Sora said, finally turning her attention to him.

Zoro blushed and sat up a little straighter, "Uh, yeah."

Sora smiled at him, kind and gentle, causing Zoro to blush just a little more, and he suddenly realized that he was so nervous because he actually genuinely wanted Sanji's mom to like him. It was such a small, dumb thing, but since Sanji cared about her so much, Zoro wanted her approval.

"Reiju has been very cryptic about you," her smile fell a little, "I'm sorry, I know almost nothing about you."

"That's okay," Zoro shrugged, "I'm a private person."

Her smile came back in full force, "We'll get to know each other this weekend. I'm thrilled you could make it, Zoro."

His blush came back in full force as he looked away, "Y-yeah," he spotted Sanji across the table smirking at him. The fucker was probably enjoy the hell out of this. He looked back at Sora, smiled as best he could, and said, "Thanks for having me."

Sora beamed at him, and he felt his own smile grow, "Of course! So, Zoro," she said as she picked up her spoon and took a sip of soup, "What do you do for a living?"

Zoro paused, his fork halfway to his mouth, "Uh-"

"Zoro's a personal trainer," Reiju answered instead, "That's how we met. I mentioned to Sanji that I needed a little help with my workout, and he said one of his friends could help," she nodded to Sanji, who had frozen, eyes wide with his grip tight on his fork, "You said he was one of the best, right?"

That snapped him out of his enough to snort, "I definitely didn't say that," he pushed the food around on his plate, "I said he was dumb and annoying but he'd get the job done."

"Wait," Niji leaned over to stare at him, "You know Sanji?"

"Uh, yeah," he shrugged as he felt more then saw Judge's glare, "We were at school together."

"It's just," he looked over at Sanji, who was eating his food as nonchalantly as a person could, "You never said."

Sanji shrugged, "I made a lot of friends at college. Since when do you care?"

"I  _c_ _are_ when they start  _dating my sister_."

"So you're one of Sanji's college friends?" Sora beamed at him, and Niji backed off, "How delightful! I always enjoy meeting Sanji's friends. You really are the whole package, aren't you?"

Her enthusiasm was so genuine, and Zoro had no idea how to respond other than a shrug and an, "I guess."

She grinned at him, and he couldn't help but smile back in response as the conversations across the rest of the table picked up again.

He could still feel Judge fuming at the other end of the table, but with both Sanji and Sora grinning at him like that, he really couldn't bring himself to care.

* * *

Once dinner was over everyone split up, the ladies taking drinks in the parlor while the men took theirs in the study. Sanji usually just joined his mother and sister in the parlor rather then deal with Judge and his brothers, but this year it would be a bit crowded with his brother's girlfriends too. Besides, at least in the study he had Zoro.

Sanji picked up his recently refilled wine glass and started following the others towards the study.

Zoro grabbed his arm, making them both hang back a little, as he whispered in his ear, "How much have you had to drink?"

Sanji's eyes shot to the hand on his arm, tracing up the muscled arm that was barely being held in his shirt. Zoro didn't usually wear sleeves, it was hard for him to find shirts with sleeves that fit, but when he did it only helped to accentuate just how strong and muscular he was, and Sanji was nothing but a sucker for some solid muscles. Damn, Zoro was so hot. He was so lucky to have him.

His eyes traced up Zoro's arm and neck, and by the time they reached his too brown eyes he'd gotten a little lost in them and had forgotten the question, "What?"

Zoro frowned, "You had two glasses of wine at dinner. How much did you have before then?"

"Oh, a few," he glanced down at his current glass, "A bit. Enough. Why?"

Zoro sighed and took Sanji's glass from him, pouring almost half of it into his own glass, "You get handsy when you're drunk."

"What? I do not."

"You're literally stroking my bicep right now."

Shit, he was. He quickly pulled his hand away as Zoro handed him back his wine glass, "That's all your getting for the rest of the night."

"What? C'mon," Sanji whined, "I'll be good, I promise."

"Hey, you're the one who wants everyone here to think you're straight," he shrugged as they followed after the others, "If you want to come out to your family by groping me in front of them because, how did you phrase it?" he smirked, and Sanji bristled, knowing exactly what he was referencing, "I'm too irresistible to resist, right? Well, that's fine by me."

He blinked and followed after him, "I did not say it like that."

"Nami still has the video. For $500 she'll delete it."

Sanji clicked his tongue, blatantly refusing to acknowledge the validity of the statement as he lead Zoro through the house, "Why'd you tell everyone we'd met already?"

"'Cause we have," he rubbed his head, "Reiju and I agreed that it would be easier to just tell everyone we were friends then to pretend we'd never met when we clearly had."

That made sense. Still, Reiju plotting with Zoro left a sour taste in his mouth, and being blindsided was never fun, "Well, thanks for the heads up, I guess."

"I gave you as much heads up about that as you gave me about Pudding," Zoro said with a frown as he swirled his drink around.

Sanji narrowed his eyes, "That's the second time you've brought up me and Pudding. What the hell do you think is going on?"

"I don't think anything," he took a sip from his drink and glared, "Just, it would have been nice to know that you two dated before."

Sanji froze and stared at him as a blush crept up his face. What the shit? "Who the fuck told you that?"

"Reiju," Zoro had stopped as well and gave him a look that was partly anger but mostly exasperated.

He groaned and ran a hand down his face, "Of fucking course she did. Can't she just mind her own damn business for once in her life?"

"So it is true?" Sanji glanced over and saw Zoro's frown deepen, "You did date her."

"I mean, yeah, I guess," Sanji sighed and looked away, rubbing the back of his neck, "I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I really didn't think it was that big a deal and it's just, the whole thing is really embarrassing. I'm not trying to hide any like, latent feelings for her or anything, trust me. And Reiju knows that, she's just saying shit."

"If it's not a big deal, why didn't you just tell me?"

"I told you, it's embarrassing, and I don't like to talk about it," but one look at Zoro's expression told him that that wasn't going to cut it. Shit, fuck Reiju, fuck Christmas, fuck this whole shitty situation, "If you really wanna know about it, I'll tell you later."

"I'd really like to know about it."

Of course he did. Fuck Zoro too, "So I'll tell you about it later," he grabbed his arm and guided him to the study, "C'mon, we gotta mingle."

Judge and the others were already talking business by the time they entered the room. He and Zoro sat down in the two free armchairs off to the side as they talked stocks and bonds and other Germa Group things that bored him to tears. He glanced down at his half empty glass and sighed, remembering that Zoro had cut him off of wine for the rest of the night, but maybe other things were okay? He looked over at the cabinet he knew Judge kept hard liquor in and pondered just how much he could get from it before anyone noticed.

One look from Zoro told him that was a fool's errand, and he sunk further into the chair, thoroughly miserable as he took a barely there, rationed sip from his glass.

"So, Zolo," Judge said as he turned his attention to their side of the room for the first time, "What exactly do you see in my daughter?"

Zoro froze, wineglass halfway to his mouth, and Sanji sat up a little straighter as if he was the one being interrogated, as he said, "Uh, well, lots of things."

"What kinds of things?" Ichiji said, leaning forward just enough to be noticeable, "If you don't mind me asking?"

"Well," Zoro took that sip of wine as his eyes darted to Sanji. Sanji's eyes widened, silently telling him to just make some shit up, and Zoro honest to god fidgeted in his seat, "She's, you know, attractive. And smart."

"Yeah, sure," Niji smirked as he threw his arm across the back of the couch, "And I'm sure her money has nothing to do with it."

"How much do you make, Mr. Roronoa?" Judge asked, as casual as anything, and Sanji wanted more than anything to just kick his fucking teeth right out of his stupid skull.

Zoro's eyes narrowed as he leaned back in his chair, "Enough," he clarified, taking a sip of his drink before continuing, "I don't give a shit about Reiju's money. I've never asked for it and I never will. That's not how our relationship works."

"So enlighten us," Yonji said, "How does your relationship work?"

"You've recently moved in together, isn't that right?" Judge asked, taking a sip of his own drink, "Who pays the bills?"

"We both do," Zoro gripped the arm of his chair, almost hard enough to break it. He was reaching dangerous levels of pissed off, and while Sanji knew he should intervene before he got into attacking mode, part of him really wanted to see Zoro punch them, "We're equal partners in our relationship."

"How pathetic," Ichiji scoffed, "A real man should be able to provide for girlfriend, not the other way around."

Zoro exhaled slowly and leaned back, directing his own smirk at Ichiji, "Maybe I'm just secure enough in my masculinity that I'm not threatened by her doing well."

Ichiji was visibly taken aback as he frowned and leaned away.

Sanji laughed, maybe a little too loud for the setting, but he couldn't help it. Having Zoro come to Christmas was the best fucking idea, he was so outside anything the Vinsmokes expected or could plan for. Maybe for Easter Reiju could pretend to date Luffy, that would be pure entertainment.

"You shut the fuck up," Niji scowled at him, "This is your fault anyway."

"Yes it is," he conceded, wiping tears from his eyes, "And I'd do it again in a heartbeat," he leaned back, pointing his glass at his brother, "You all have this obsession with money and titles and whatnot. Some of us don't give a shit about things like that, and it just boggles your fucking minds."

He glanced over and saw Zoro smiling at him. He shot him a quick grin before turning back to the rest of the room.

Judge gave him his patented stern look from across the room, but fuck him. Sanji was an adult now; he couldn't touch him. He took an actual sip from his drink and stared right back.

"It's getting late," Judge suddenly said, breaking eye contact. He set down his empty glass and stood up. His sons stood up too, but Sanji was content to stay seated, and he noticed Zoro following his lead, "Excuse me."

After he left, the Vinsmokes sat down again and Yonji asked, "So Zoro, just what kinds of girls are you into?"

Zoro froze again, "Uh, well, I'm with Reiju so…" he made a vague hand gesture.

"No, yeah, I get that," he grinned and leaned forward, "But you've dated girls before her and you still look around, yeah? What's your type?"

"What do you look for in a woman?" Niji clarified with his own grin.

Oh, this was gonna be good. Sanji fished his phone out of his pocket and opened up the camera, casually aiming it at Zoro while pretending to be indifferent to the whole discussion.

"I, you know," he gestured wildly, "I just, I love how when you look at a woman and you go, 'Yeah, that person over there is in no way a man. Definitely a woman that one,' you know? You get it right? How women are just. Like. People. That exist. And aren't men," he gestured again and leaned back in his chair, taking a sip from his drink before ending the rant with, "Super feminine. Love that about women."

Sanji couldn't help but let out a snort. He quickly opened the group chat and sent the video along with the caption,  _Zoro being Straight_.

The replies were instantaneous.

******Nami** **:**  
Holy shit that's hilarious  
******Usopp** **:**  
That's the most awkward thing I've seen since Franky wearing pants  
******Robin** **:**  
I just showed Franky  
******Robin** **:**  
He's in tears. Can't tell if its from laughter or if it actually caused him eye damage  
******Jinbei** **:**  
Unreal  
******Brook** **:**  
Being a 'Lover of Woman' so to speak does not seem to become you Zoro.  
******Luffy** **:**  
Looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooool(Laughing Face )(Laughing Face )(Laughing Face )(Face With Tears Of Joy )(Face With Tears Of Joy )(Face With Tears Of Joy )(Face With Tears Of Joy )(Face With Tears Of Joy )(Pizza)  
******Chopper** **:**  
(Face Screaming In Fear )

Sanji looked up from his phone and saw Zoro glaring at him. He gave him his most innocent smile, and his glare darkened.

Almost immediately, Zoro sat up a little straighter. He crossed his legs and shifted into a position that was similar to the one Sanji was sitting in, ran a hand quickly through his hair so a few strands fell onto his forehead, and repositioned his wineglass so he was cradling it in his hand with the stem between his fingers.

Sanji pulled the camera up again and started filming.

"Women," Zoro continued, swirling his wine, "Are delicate flowers, each a beautiful and intoxicating mystery. They are life's greatest treasure, and need to be protected and treated as such. Men are nothing but mud swilling pigs when compared with the grace and majesty of women."

He glanced over at Yonji, "You asked for my type? Why? When faced with the buffet of life, does one only order the soup? Does one limit themself to only appetizers or salads? Or do you sample all, feast upon all the delectable courses life has to offer? Why have only one type of woman when every woman is a flawless masterpiece?"

"Yeah," Yonji countered, "But you're dating my sister, so I hope you're not doing a lot of sampling."

Zoro took a dramatic pause to sip his wine, "Reiju is a queen amongst peasants, a goddess amongst heathens, an angel sent from the very heavens just to show us mere mortals that perfection does exist in this world. She's a one of a kind jewel, and I am but a humble jeweler, completely entranced by her existence."

"Yeah," Niji nodded as he took a sip of his own drink, "I think I get it."

Sanji did  _not_  sound like that, thank you very much. To prove his point he sent that video in the group chat as well.

**Sanji:** I don't sound like that :\  
******Nami** **:**  
Oh my gooooooooooooooooooooooooood  
******Nami** **:**  
Best. Christmas. Ever. I'm saving this for Reasons  
******Robin** **(or more likely, Franky on Robin's phone):**  
That sounds exactly like you dude  
******Chopper** **:**  
Omg two Sanjis! O_O  
******Jinbei** **:**  
(Face With Tears Of Joy )  
******Brook** **:**  
I've seen couples take on each other's personality quirks and particular turns of phrase before but this is certainly something else!  
******Usopp** **:**  
Sorry Luffy looks like you just lost your Best Sanji Impersonation title  
******Luffy** **:**  
What? Noooooooo!  
******Luffy** **:**  
That title is mine!!! I refuse to lose!!!!!!!

Luffy then sent a picture of himself with a hastily sharpied swirl on his forehead by his eyebrow, his hair thrown over his right eye as he sucked on a lollipop like it was a cigarette.

******Luffy** **:**  
Who the hell ate all the meat?  
******Usopp** **:**  
An Exact Copy  
******Nami** **:**  
Can't tell the difference  
******Chopper** **:**  
O_O ThREE SANJIS?!

Fuck all of you , Sanji texted.

Then he added, Except Nami .

He looked up and saw Zoro smirking at him. He gave him his best glare as he settled further into his chair and took another minuscule sip of wine.

This was going to be a long night.

 


	3. What My True Love Gave to Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Vinsmokes attend the Winter Festival, and Sanji and Zoro realize this fake dating thing may be a little harder then they thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Part of me is like 'make the chapters even' and part of me is like 'story flow!!!!' so here's an extra long chapter. I'll try and have the next chapter out by Christmas Eve and the whole thing done before the New Year, but we'll see.

A maid showed Zoro to a room on the second floor with a large pink zero on it. He thanked her as she bowed and walked away, and he opened the door and entered.

The room was just as pink as everything else associated with Reiju, pink walls, pink furniture, pink sheets on the bed. At this point he wasn’t even surprised by how deep the color coding went, and he absently wondered what Sanji’s color was.

Reiju was already in here, lounging on her four poster king sized bed in nothing but her underwear and a thin t-shirt, legs spread a little as she casually flipped through a magazine. Her pose seemed a bit too casual to be anything other than planned as she looked up from her magazine to gauge his reaction.

He ignored her as he went over to his own things and dug around for his toiletries.

“You’re not into women at all?” she asked as she leaned forward, “Or is it just me?” Her tone was curious, a sharp difference to the offended tone most women had when they asked him that.

“Not at all,” he replied, pulling out his toothbrush, “Bathroom?”

She nodded to the other side of the room, “Through that door.”

He grunted his thanks as he went to the bathroom which, unsurprisingly, was covered in pink. He shrugged as he started brushing his teeth.

“When did you first know?” Reiju asked from the doorway.

Zoro spit in the sink and rinsed out his mouth as he looked at her reflection in the mirror, “That I was gay?” he asked, and she nodded, “Since middle school.”

“Any particular revelation bring that on?”

He shrugged and turned around, “Not really. At one point all the other guys in my class were drooling over this one actress and I couldn’t get over how toned her boyfriend was, so by then it was just obvious.”

“I see,” she tapped her fingers on the door jam, “And you’ve been out ever since?”

“I don’t exactly broadcast my sexuality to the world,” he crossed his arms in front of him and leaned back against the sink, “Mostly because it’s not anybody’s business. But I don’t hide it either. If people find out, then they find out.”

She hummed and turned back into the room, “An interesting philosophy.”

“What about you?” he asked as he followed her, “You into guys at all?”

“Not really,” she shrugged, “I’m not really into anything.”

“Like asexual?” he asked. She nodded as she settled back down into the bed and looked at him expectantly. He nodded in return, “Alright.”

She raised an eyebrow, “That’s it?”

“Is there something else you want me to say?”

“It’s just, people usually wonder why I’m in a relationship at all if I’m not after sex.”

“Yours and Pudding’s relationship is between you and Pudding. Why you’re together and all that isn’t my business. As long as it works and you’re happy, what do I care,” he lay down on the other side of the bed. The mattress was so soft he sank into it a few inches before settling, and there was an ocean of blankets and mattress between the two of them, “I have a friend who’s ace too, so I get it.”

"Sanji mentioned when I told him. Luffy, right?"

He hummed in response and spread his arms out as wide as he could, but he could tell he was nowhere near close enough to reach Reiju. Just how big was this bed?

“What about you and Sanji?” she asked as she turned onto her side to look at him, “You don’t mind that he likes girls?”

“Not really,” he shrugged as best he could in a mattress that was trying to keep him prisoner, “Him being bi is just another part of who he is.”

“You’re not worried about him ditching you for some girl?”

His eyes narrowed, “People cheat for a lot of reasons, but not because of their sexualities,” he stared up at the canopy above the bed, “I know Sanji, and he’s not the kind of guy who cheats on someone. I trust him.”

Reiju hummed in response, eyes downcast as she looked away.

Suddenly there was a knock on the door. Zoro struggled out of the bed and made his way to the door to open it. On the other side was Pudding, her hair down and brushed away from her face, sporting a frown.

“Can I talk to Reiju?” she said, crossing her arms in front of her, “Alone?”

There was no reason why she couldn’t, but Zoro was still peeved at how she’d behaved around Sanji, and was just stubborn enough to say, “Why?”

Pudding frowned, “That’s really not your concern.”

Zoro stayed where he was, an immovable rock, mostly to piss her off.

She sighed, “Look, I’m sorry if the whole ‘me being with Sanji’ thing is pissing you off, but you agreed to this shit too, right? You have no reason to be mad at me for doing exactly what we all agreed to.”

She had a point, but he didn’t like it, “You don’t see me throwing myself all over Reiju.”

“Oh? Is that your problem?” she uncrossed her arms, a devilish smirk growing on her face, “I guess yours and Sanji’s relationship is so fragile that a little outside nudging will break it? Good to know.”

Zoro growled, as she continued “Well, whatever. Maybe you should try throwing yourself at Reiju. You know, actually try to sell this thing?” she shrugged, “Or don’t. It’s not really my concern. Now can I please speak to my girlfriend?”

“Whatever,” he said, stepping aside to let her in, wondering if this counted as later and where Sanji was in this maze of a mansion. 

As she passed him, she paused, drumming her fingers on the door jam and said, “The playacting, it’s not for you.”

Before he could say anything in response, she leaned in and whispered in his ear, “Sanji’s room is three floors up. Giant three on the door. Can’t miss it.”

With that she entered the room and shut the door, effectively locking him out.

What the hell was that all about? But the last thing he wanted to do was stand in the middle of the hall and try to analyze Pudding’s motivations, so he wandered off down the hall to find the stairs.

After wandering around the house for several minutes, Zoro was still no closer to finding Sanji’s room. He did manage to find a door with a giant blue two on it, which wasn’t quite the three Pudding said it was, but Sanji liked blue, and maybe Pudding was just fucking with him.

“Oh, Zoro,” he turned and saw Nina approaching the door, “What are you doing here?”

Shit, this must be Niji’s room. Damnit, where the hell was Sanji? “Looking for Sanji. Have you seen him?”

“He’s probably in his room,” she said with a smile.

“And that would be, where?”

“Oh, that’s right,” she placed her hand over her mouth, “you’ve never been here before. It’s just up one more floor. He’s got the three on his door, get it? Because he’s the third quadruplet,” she giggled, “It’s so helpful how they all have everything numbered so perfectly, right?”

“Sure,” he agreed quickly, and turned to leave, “Thanks.”

“Or,” she threw her arms around his shoulders, locking him in place, “Instead of going to Sanji’s room,” she dragged one hand across his shoulders and down his chest, moving it behind her to open the door, “You can come in here, with me.”

Zoro’s mind went completely blank, “Huh?”

“You’re very cute,” she said as her other hand slid up the back of his neck and she started playing with his hair, “I like cute guys. Would you like to spend the night with me?”

“Uh,” he tried to take a step back, but her hand had slid into his hair, holding him in place as her other started sliding up his chest, “I’m with S- Reiju. I’m with Reiju.”

She hummed as she stepped closer, pressing her body up against his, “I know. Reiju can come too, if you want. I’d rather have you to myself, but whatever makes you more comfortable,” she sing-songed as her hand made its way up to his face and started stroking his reddening cheek.

“Wh-what about Niji?” he asked as her fingers moved across to his lips and his face grew even hotter.

“We can wait for Niji too, if you want,” she said, leaning in closer so they were sharing the same breathing space, her breasts pressing into his chest, “I don’t mind sharing, especially with a cutie like you.”

As she leaned in for a kiss, Zoro got enough of his senses back to grab her wrists and pry her wandering hands away. He was blushing furiously as he let her go and finally took a step back to catch his breath.

“Sorry, not interested,” he said as he bolted away from there and tried to find the stairs again.

Eventually he found his way to the floor above and was outside a door with a giant yellow three on it. This had to be Sanji’s room.

He approached the door and hesitated. Normally he wouldn’t even think twice about just barging into Sanji’s space unless he was in some kind of mood, that was one of the perks of being a couple and living together. But he was supposed to be pretending they weren’t a couple, that they were just friends. Should he knock instead? Was that what friends did?

What the hell was he thinking? He knew how friends behaved! He had lots of friends, and none of them ever knocked. This situation was messing with his head. He opened the door and walked into the room.

The room was very yellow. Not nearly as yellow as Reiju’s was pink, but there was a significant yellow color theme going on. That was surprising, since whenever Sanji picked out the decor in their apartment he always went for a blue theme, but tastes changed when people grew up. Maybe Sanji had gotten over yellow.

He noticed the balcony door was open and saw Sanji standing outside smoking a cigarette. As quietly as he could, he approached the door and leaned on the doorframe, “Aren’t you cold?”

Sanji startled a bit, but turned to face him with a mischievous grin on his face, “Yeah, you wanna come warm me up?”

Finally, they were alone together, away from prying family eyes and fake girlfriends. Zoro grinned too as he made his way across the balcony and wrapped his arms around his waist. Sanji took the cigarette out of his mouth and exhaled the smoke away from Zoro’s face before he leaned forward and kissed him.

One of Sanji’s hands moved into his hair as Zoro rested his hands on Sanji’s hips. It hadn’t even been a full day, but he’d missed this. Out of all the issues he anticipated with this dumb scheme, he underestimated how frustrating it would be to have Sanji right there and be unable to touch him however he liked. 

Eventually they pulled apart, and Zoro said, “Your brother’s girlfriend was trying to get me to sleep with her.”

Sanji hummed as he took a drag from his cigarette, “Which one?”

“Nina,” he sighed, resting his forehead on Sanji’s shoulder as Sanji gently stroked his head.

“Can you blame her?” he said, shifting his head to plant a kiss on Zoro’s temple, and Zoro could feel his smirk as he pulled away, “You’re just too irresistible to resist.”

Zoro groaned as Sanji chuckled. He kissed his forehead, and Zoro accepted the affection with a grunt as he pulled away. 

Before he could get too far, Sanji cupped his face with his free hand and stroked his cheek with his thumb, “Thanks for putting up with this bullshit.”

Zoro placed his hand over Sanji’s and tilted his head to kiss his palm, “I put up with your bullshit on a daily basis. This is nothing.”

“Shithead,” he grumbled, putting out the rest of his cigarette in the ashtray on the railing as he buried his face into the crook of Zoro’s neck and wrapped his arms around him in a tight hug.

Zoro hummed, wrapping an arm around his waist and buried a hand in his hair, content to just enjoy the warmth Sanji was giving off and the moment they were in.

Eventually he had to ask, “So, it’s later. Are you gonna tell me about you and Pudding now?”

Sanji groaned and tried to burrow deeper into Zoro, “Are you still on that?” he grumbled into his skin, “I told you, it’s nothing.”

“If it’s nothing,” Zoro said, gently maneuvering Sanji’s face away from him, “Then just tell me.”

“‘S embarrassing,” he mumbled as he stepped away and lit another cigarette. He leaned against the railing and took a long drag before looking over at Zoro, “Uh, you know how when we first met I wasn’t,” he gestured with his cigarette, “very secure in my attraction to men?”

Zoro recalled an incident shortly after they met when Sanji had kicked someone’s teeth out just because he said he looked nice, “An understatement.”

“Yeah, well, it was worse in high school,” he sighed and ran a hand through his hair.

Zoro leaned against the railing next to him and gestured for him to continue.

He took a deep breath and exhaled a cloud of smoke, “There was this guy on the soccer team with me, Gin. A year ahead of me,” he tapped his fingers on the railing and chewed on the filter of his cigarette, “He was involved with gangs or drugs or something, a real bad boy, and I had the biggest crush on him,” he he looked Zoro up and down and smirked, “Guess I have a type.”

“Only if he was devilishly attractive and could kick your ass,” Zoro said, nudging his shoulder.

Sanji rolled his eyes and looked down at the ground as he kicked his heel against the railing, “Anyway, I was in love with him, and I was freaking out about it, because I didn’t want to be gay. So somewhere in my panicking teenage brain, I figured that if I was in love with a girl instead, that would be enough proof that I was still straight. And, well, Pudding was right there,” he waved a hand in front of him, “We were already friends, so it wasn’t hard to convince myself that I had a crush on her instead.”

“Sounds like reasoning your dumb brain would come up with.”

“Yeah, well,” Sanji took a long drag from his cigarette, exhaling the smoke up into the air. Zoro noticed the pink tinge on his cheeks grow, so he placed his hand over Sanji’s free one and gave it a squeeze.

Sanji looked down at their hands and continued, “So, uh, in order to convince myself I was in love with her, I told everyone how much I did. Loudly. And constantly. I annoyed the fuck out of everyone, and to this day I’m still surprised she can look me in the eye. I must have made her miserable,” he sighed, exhaling more smoke.

“Anyway, part of this was asking her out every time I saw her, which was a lot because, despite all this, she was still my friend. I’d ask her out, she’d reject me, and we’d go on with our lives,” he pulled his hand away, “This went on for months until one day she said yes.”

Sanji grimaced and looked away, “Pretty much the moment we started dating I realized that it wasn’t what I wanted at all. But, I had been the one to persistently ask her out, and she seemed to enjoy having a boyfriend, so we just, kept dating. After several months of it, I’d had enough and finally broke up with her.”

“How did she take that?”

“Terrible, she was devastated,” he took another drag from his cigarette, “I’d say she’d fallen in love with me, but we both know how hard that is.”

“Hey,” Zoro said, attempting to cut through the self loathing he could see swirling behind his eyes when Sanji glanced up at him, “You’re hard to like,” he kissed his cheek, “You’re very easy to love.”

Sanji hummed and looked away, but he could see his shoulders relax as he continued, “So, yeah, she spent the rest of high school flip flopping between wanting nothing to do with me and trying to get me to date her again,” he knocked the ash off the end of his cigarette, “She also made time to sabotage every relationship I might have had, but I’d also ruined every relationship she could have had, so I’d consider us even there.”

“Whatever happened to Gin?”

“Got arrested, dropped out part way through his senior year. I think he was in and out of prison for a while there.” 

“Why am I not surprised that the first guy you had a crush on was arrested?”

He laughed and took a drag from his cigarette, “I saw him again recently. He’d gotten his GED and was getting his life back on track,” he smirked, “Still devilishly attractive.”

“Whatever,” Zoro pouted until Sanji leaned forward and kissed his cheek. His face softened and he asked, “What about Pudding? Does she still have a crush on you?”

“I don’t think so, or else why would she be dating Reiju?” he frowned and took a hit from his cigarette, “But part of me wonders if she’s only dating her because she’s my sister, as some kind of like, back-up version of me,” he sighed, “I don’t know, is that self-centered of me to think?”

“Yeah,” Zoro easily agreed, causing Sanji to smack his arm. He knew Sanji had a habit of blaming himself and getting guilty over things that weren’t his fault, so he tried his best to reassure him, “But even if it is true, it’s not your fault. You were just a teenager who did some dumb things, but you learned and grew up and got over them. If she hasn’t yet, that’s on her.”

“I guess,” Sanji sighed as he rested his head on his shoulder.

Zoro kissed the top of his head and lay his own head on top of Sanji’s.

After a few moments of peaceful silence where Sanji finished his cigarette, Zoro said, “You’re right though, that was super embarrassing.”

Sanji elbowed him hard in the side, causing him to recoil, “Fucking shithead.”

Zoro chuckled before leaning forward to kiss him, which Sanji eagerly returned.

“Um,” they broke apart and saw Pudding standing in the doorway. Her face was red as she pointedly looked anywhere but at them, “I think, you should probably go back to Reiju now.”

“Uh, right,” his hands fell away from Sanji as he looked into his eyes, “So I guess, I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Yeah,” Sanji leaned forward before his eyes darted to Pudding. They darted back to his lips for a brief moment before he eventually sighed leaned away, “Good night.”

“Night,” he mumbled, disappointed. He brushed Sanji’s hair out of his eyes and stared at his full face for a moment before he finally turned and left the room.

Back out in the hallway, he stared longingly back at Sanji’s door before shaking himself and continuing on his way.

Where the hell was Reiju’s room again?

* * *

Sanji took the perfectly poached egg out of the water and set it alongside the others. Six eggs should be enough, but would anyone else be down sooner and want some?

“Master Sanji,” the family chef insisted yet again, “I really should be the one making breakfast.”

“And I’m sure your breakfast is as lovely as you, Cosette,” he said with a smile, “The others will enjoy it thoroughly.” 

“But, Madame Sora’s condition means she has certain dietary restrictions, and-”

“I know all about my mom’s dietary restrictions,” Sanji said, shooting her an apologetic smile, “I’m sorry for taking over your kitchen and stepping on your toes, but please let me do this. It’s been a while since I’ve been able to make something for her.”

Cosette’s face went red and she stammered out, “A-alright then. 

He knew at least one person who would be down before Cosette needed her kitchen back, and decided to poach a few more eggs just in case.

Just as he was finishing up plating his perfect masterpiece, Zoro wandered into the kitchen, dressed down in the pants he’d worn the night before and the t-shirt he probably slept in. He yawned, rubbing the sleep from his eyes as he sat down on the other side of the counter.

“What’s for breakfast, Cook?” he asked.

He noticed Cosette bristle with indignation at the casual manner of address, but ignored it, instead replying, “Eggs Florentine for me, whatever Cosette has planned in a few hours for you.”

“What, c’mon,” Zoro whined, “I’m hungry now.”

“And you’ll be hungry later, when Cosette finishes making breakfast for everyone,” he placed the smaller portion of eggs on the counter away from Zoro.

Zoro grabbed the plate anyway, giving the portion size a dubious look, “That’s all?”

Sanji smacked his hand with the back of his spoon and yanked the plate away, “That one’s not for you!”

Zoro grinned, shaking the sting from the hit out of his hand, “So you did make me some?”

“Maybe I did,” he placed the dish off to the side again and turned back to the stove, plating a much larger portion, “But with table manners like yours, maybe you don’t deserve it.”

He heard Zoro sigh, as if being polite was like some kind of torturous task for him, before he said, “Please may I have some food?”

“That's better,” he turned back around and placed the plate and some silverware in front of Zoro.

Cosette gave him a quizzical look, her eyes darting back and forth between him and Zoro as he made up another plate. Shit, he had fallen into his usual morning routine with Zoro. Was this whole scene a bit too domestic for casual friends? Did Cosette know or suspect the truth? Who would she tell if she did? The rest of the staff? Would word get back to his mother?

Before he let his mind spiral off and wander down that panicked path, he quickly handed Cosette her portion and said, “Here, as a thank you for letting me use your kitchen.”

“M-Master Sanji!” she cried, accepting the plate with a red face, “You didn’t have to do that!”

“I’m not about to let you stand there hungry while we’re sitting around eating,” he said, plating his own portion and taking a seat at the counter, “Take a moment to eat before you start on breakfast.”

She nodded and quietly sat down next to him.

They ate in relative silence, broken occasionally by praise for the dish from Cosette. When she had finished, she gathered up her plate and utensils, brought them over to the sink, and started her own prep work.

“Do you need us to move?” Sanji offered, “I’d hate to get in your way.”

She shook her head, “You’re fine there. Besides, Madame Sora will be down any minute.”

Zoro frowned and glanced over at the remaining plate, “You made your mom breakfast?”

It was an accurate and innocuous statement, but Sanji found himself blushing anyway, “Well, yeah,” he shrugged and took a bite of his own food, “What’s so strange about that?”

“Nothing,” Zoro smirked at him, “Mama’s boy.”

Sanji snarled, “Listen here fuckface-”

Before he could say anything further, the kitchen door opened, and in walked his mother.

“Sanji!” she gasp, covering her hand with her mouth, “I can’t believe you would use such foul language towards Zoro! He’s our guest!”

“Yeah,” Zoro’s smirk grew. He was enjoying the hell out of this and it made Sanji want to kick him, “Think of my poor virgin ears.”

Sanji held back a comment about Zoro’s virgin anything that would have been highly inappropriate in front of his mother and instead replied, “Sorry.”

“Don’t apologize to me,” she said, placing her hands on Zoro’s shoulders, “Apologize to Zoro.”

Sanji closed his eyes and took a deep breath before he opened them, “Zoro, I’m sorry you had to hear me say such terrible things about your face.”

“Apology accepted, Cook,” he said as he took another bite of his food, “You did make me breakfast.”

“Oh, Sanji, you cooked?” his mom beamed at him as she sat down next to Zoro, “What a delightful treat. I hope you saved me some.”

“Of course,” he placed her plate in front of her and handed her utensils, “You are my first and best customer.”

“Such a sweet boy,” she leaned forward and kissed his cheek. He blushed, and pointedly did not look at Zoro to see his reaction, “Pudding is so lucky to have you.”

At that Sanji did look at Zoro, but he was focused on his plate, pushing one of the tomato slices around to mop up the sauce, “Yeah…”

“Mmm, Sanji this is delicious!” she exclaimed, drawing his attention back to her, “Absolutely divine! Every time I eat your food it just gets better and better.”

Sanji was grinning wide, he couldn’t help himself. He always loved hearing people appreciate his food, and her praise always held a special place in his heart, “Thanks.”

“We didn’t get much of a chance to talk last night,” she said as she continued eating, “So tell me. How is your restaurant doing?”

“Excellent,” Sanji replied, finishing off his own food, “We’ve been busier than ever.”

“I’m glad to hear it! You’ve worked so hard, you deserve all the success that comes to you. I’m so happy people are starting to appreciate your talents,” Sanji grinned as she continued, “And how’s Zeff? Still doing well, I hope.”

“The old man is as energetic as ever. And still an absolute pain to be around.”

“Did he get the gift basket I sent him?”

“Yeah, he complained for a solid hour about what to do with all that wine,” Sanji sighed, tapping his fingers against the counter top, “And then he snapped at us when we tried to take some, so I know he liked it.”

“He always takes such good care of you. I appreciate it so much,” she sighed as she finished off her meal, “I’m glad you two found each other.”

Sanji blushed and looked away. He knew his mother went out of her way to avoid his issues with Judge, and he understood why even if he didn’t particularly like it, but he always appreciated that she acknowledged Zeff’s role in his life.

Zoro stood up, gathering up his empty plate and utensils. As he walked to the sink, he stopped by his mom’s place and gathered her dirty dishes as well. 

“Oh, Zoro!” she exclaimed, “You don’t have to do that. You’re a guest!”

“‘S fine,” he said as he gathered Sanji’s dishes as well and walked them to the sink, “I’m used to it.”

“What a sweetheart,” she beamed at him, and Sanji noticed his cheeks turn just a little bit pink at the praise, “I hope you treat Reiju like this too.”

Zoro hummed in response as Sanji glanced away. He tried not to picture Zoro doting on his sister, but the image kept popping up in his mind anyway, making him angry and frustrated.

“I’m sorry I haven’t been able to come out to see you there lately,” his mother said, drawing his attention back to her, “I keep wanting to, but…”

“That’s alright,” he insisted, placing his hands over hers, “I know you haven’t been feeling well. I’m a bad son for not coming to see you more often.”

“No you’re not,” she lightly slapped at his hands, “You’re the best son I could ask for.”

Sanji smiled gratefully at her as Zoro returned to the counter, carefully balancing three coffee cups that Cosette had prepared and placed them down in front of each of them. 

“Oh, thank you, Zoro,” she said, picking up the cup as Sanji pulled away, “You really are so sweet.”

Sanji’s smile grew as he picked up his own cup and Zoro sat back down.

For a moment, he could pretend that he had come out to his mom, and she had accepted his and Zoro’s relationship, that they could have more mornings like this, just the three of them, without it being deceitful or awkward.

As he glanced between his mother and his boyfriend, he wanted this moment to last so he could pretend for just a little longer.

* * *

Zoro was bundled up in the sweater Nami had tossed in his bag and a jacket as he and Reiju walked arm in arm between the stalls. He wasn’t that cold and probably didn’t need the jacket, but Sora had insisted he wear one since it was snowing, and he didn’t want to make her worry.

The festival itself was just a small thing that the locals threw every year. Sora seemed to be the driving force behind the Vinsmokes coming every year, both as a moment of Christmas bonding for the family and as a chance to give the servants a chance to finish decorating the house for the party that evening. Although, despite what was supposed to be a family bonding activity, Judge had opted to stay home. Not that Zoro minded, his sons were bad enough.

“So you must like, spend a lot of time at the gym, right?” Yonji said next to him, his gloved hand clasped around Fiona’s, “Being a personal trainer, yeah?”

“Uh, yeah,” he had no idea why Yonji had suddenly decided to start up a conversation with him, but he didn’t like it, “Kinda comes with the territory.”

“So how much can you lift?”

Great, he was one of  _ those _ guys, “Enough.”

“C’mon,” he poked his arm, “You look like you’ve got some muscle on you. I just wanna know if you can lift more than me.”

Zoro did work out a lot, and he was constantly training to become stronger, but that was mostly for himself and his goals, not to win pissing contests with guys like Yonji.

So he shrugged and said, “Yeah, probably.”

Yonji glowered as Fiona and Reiju laughed. As his face started morphing into a full blown pout, Fiona leaned up and kissed his cheek, “Don’t be like that, Babe. You’re always the strongest in my book.”

That perked him up a little, and Fiona guided them a little ways away to look at some of the wares for sale.

“These are quaint,” Zoro heard Dani say a few feet away, looking at some jewelry for sale, “Not too gauche considering the materials at hand.”

“Would you like me to buy it for you?” Ichiji asked.

Dani hummed as she thought, “I don’t think the aesthetic is quite right for my style, but maybe if I also had these…”

As they walked away from them he saw Niji and Nina perusing a stall selling handcrafted ceramics and casually steered him and Reiju a little further away, but that only took him closer to where Sanji and Pudding were shopping. 

He pouted at their joined hands, and as she leaned up and whispered something in Sanji’s ear that made him laugh, Zoro had to physically turn himself away from them and focus on something else.

“These are cute,” Reiju said, fingering a pair of earrings, “If you’re still thinking of something to get me.”

Zoro grumbled and glanced down at the jewelry. He had finished his actual Christmas shopping weeks ago, but of course he didn’t expect to need something for his fake girlfriend. Luckily part of the festival included stalls set up by local artisans, and apparently the Vinsmokes had a tradition of buying each other Christmas presents there anyway.

“You can afford pure gold and platinum jewelry,” he said, glancing down at the earrings, “Why do you guys buy your presents here?”

“When your family can already buy anything they want, what else can you gift them but something uniquely handmade?” she glanced behind her, then leaned up and kissed his cheek, “I’ll go pick out something for you, so get me something nice, alright?”

She let go of his arm and walked away.

He glanced back down at the jewelry. He didn’t know much about Reiju and he knew even less about jewelry, so he didn’t really know how he was supposed to pick something out for her. 

Something sparkling caught his eye, and he turned to find a blue butterfly pendant hanging from a silver chain. He picked it up and watched as the light caught it as it turned in his hand.

“You got this in pink?” he asked the stall owner, and frowned at the butterfly, “And as a moth?”

She looked at the necklace and grinned, “I got just the thing.”

She dug around behind the counter as Zoro looked at the rest of her wares. He noticed a round pair of cufflinks in the corner, and picked them up, turning them over in his hand. Inside the dome on a blue background was a carefully painted and detailed white anchor, similar to the one on the Baratie’s logo.

He’d already gotten Sanji a present, a set of cookware that Sanji had printed out a picture of and the description for, circled, and left for him to find with a note saying ‘FOR SANJI FOR CHRISTMAS,’ but maybe he’d like these too?

“You got a good eye,” the stall owner said as she returned, “Anchors are a symbol of hope in some places, that’s always good luck, and that’s some real nice silver,” she presented him with another pendent, almost identical to the one in his hand, except colored pink and with narrower wings, “Here, slap this on the chain instead.”

He did as she said, placing the butterfly pendant carefully back on the table and holding up the now moth necklace. Yeah, Reiju would probably like that.

“Normally both would go for about forty bucks a piece, but for you, I’ll make it thirty.”

So sixty dollars total. He dug around for his wallet but only found a twenty inside. Still, he knew Nami would never forgive him if he didn’t at least try, “How about twenty?”

She gave him a dubious look, “Twenty a piece?”

Damn. He set the cufflinks back down and handed her the money, “I’ve only got twenty.”

She took the money and frowned, glancing down at the cufflinks, before shrugging and boxing up them along with the necklace, “Hey, I appreciate a guy who appreciates moths. Take ‘em for twenty.”

He blinked, the Usopp voice in his head telling him she deserved full price for her work, but that was overpowered by the Nami voice telling him to just take the deal, so he put both boxes in his pocket and said, “Thanks.”

“No problem, my guy,” she said, adding his twenty to her stack of cash, “Happy Holidays and all that.”

“Yeah, you too,” he said as he walked away.

As he looked around for Reiju, he noticed that the rest of the Vinsmoke group seemed to have wandered off somewhere. Great, now he had to go find them. He shoved his hands in his pockets and started walking.

After wandering around the festival grounds for a few minutes, he heard someone shout, “Zoro! There you are!” He turned and saw Sora coming towards him, cheeks rosy and slightly out of breath. 

“Reiju said you had a habit of wandering off,” she said, trying to catch her breath as he approached her, “So I came to find you.”

“I would have found my way back,” he said, offering her his arm, “But, thanks.”

She smiled up at him and took his arm gratefully, squeezing it tight as they started walking. He couldn’t help but notice that she was leaning most of her weight onto him, but she was light, and he had strength to spare.

“So, Zoro,” she said after a while, “I haven’t had a chance to get to know you yet. Tell me about yourself.”

“Uh,” he could feel her gaze on him as blood rushed to his cheeks. He focused on the ground instead, carefully matching his steps to hers as they crunched through the snow, “There’s not much to tell.”

“Oh pish-posh,” she playfully poked his arm, “You are a unique person with your own unique story to tell, so tell.”

He grinned, he couldn’t help it, she reminded him so much of Sanji, “What would you like to know?”

“Hm,” she tapped her lips, “Tell me, about, your family.”

“Uh, I’m not really all that close to my family family,” he scratched his ear, “But I have a close knit group of friends that I consider family.”

“Oh,” she perked up, “Is Sanji one of them?”

He chuckled, “Yeah, Sanji’s part of it. Nami too, uh, she mentioned that you met her once?”

“The orange-haired girl, right?” Zoro nodded as she beamed, “Yes, I remember her well. She was very sweet, I’m surprised that she and Sanji never got together. He seemed to like her a lot.”

Zoro wasn’t, considering Nami was the biggest lesbian he knew, and he knew a lot of lesbians, “Yeah, well, some people are better off as friends.”

“Who else is there?” she asked, leaning a little more into him, “Whenever Sanji talks about his friends he never goes into specifics, and I’m a little curious.”

“Well, there’s Luffy,” Zoro said as he dug into his pocket and pulled out his phone, “He’s basically a giant ball of energy in human form,” he scrolled through their group chat until he found the picture Luffy had sent last night, “He’s got a good heart, but he can’t keep himself out of trouble,” he tapped the picture and showed her.

“Is he playing Sanji? How delightful!” she laughed, and his grin spread wider at the sound as he took his phone back to see what else he could find, and stumbled across a selfie Usopp took of the two of them and Chopper.

“The guy on the left is Usopp,” he said, showing her the phone, “He can’t tell the truth to save his life, but he’s the most dependable guy I know. The guy on the right is Chopper. He’s real smart, currently working his way through med school.”

“Aw, they both look so happy,” she smiled, “They must love hanging out with you.”

“I guess,” Zoro absently flicked to the next photo and froze for a second when it was of Nami and Vivi at the beach, but luckily they weren’t being super flirty, just sitting closer to each other than friends normally would, “Nami you know, and her, uh, friend Vivi.”

“What lovely girls. Did you ever date them?”

“Uh, no,” he took his phone back and scrolled through the pictures again, “I’m not really their type.”

The next picture he found was from last year’s Christmas party, a group shot of them all wearing different colored Santa hats. Perfect, “This woman is Robin," he pointed her out, "she’s a professor of archaeology at a local college and I’m pretty sure an actual genius. She’s traveled practically everywhere. The guy next to her his her fiancè  Franky. He’s an oddball, but a real good guy.”

“Oh!” she perked up, “When’s the wedding?”

“They haven’t set a date yet, but they’re aiming for sometime in May last I heard,” he pointed out the other people in the picture, “The tall guy is Brook, he says he’s like eighty something, but her certainly doesn’t act it. He was some kind of rock star back in the day, Soul King?”

“Oh, really?” her eyes went wide, “I remember Soul King. He was big when I was in high school, one of my school friends was convinced she was going to marry him,” she chuckled at the memory, “Why didn’t Sanji ever tell me he knew him?”

“Beats me,” he shrugged, “But if your friend ever wants to make good on her promise, let me know,” he pointed out the last guy, “And that’s Jinbei. He’s Luffy’s brother’s friend’s cousin’s former roommate or something, but he recently moved down the street from Luffy, so now they’re best friends. Good guy, and he’s probably the best at rolling with Luffy’s punches.”

“They look like wonderful people. Do they get along with Reiju?”

“Oh, yeah,” he nodded and looked away, deciding on a half truth to give her, “I wouldn’t be dating her if they didn’t.”

“Good,” she squeezed his arm, “I’m glad, and thank you for showing me all of Sanji’s friends.”

“Yeah,” he put his phone back in his pocket.

“So tell me something about you, Zoro,” she said, brushing a few stray snowflakes off her arm, “What do you want to do more than anything in the world?”

Well, if she wanted to know life goals, there was really only one that mattered, “There’s this man,” he frowned, reaching up to touch his jacket and the scar underneath that ran across his chest, “He’s kinda considered the world’s greatest swordsman, and I’ve sorta made it my life goal to defeat him and take his title.”

“Such lofty ambitions, but it's good to aim for the top,” she smiled, “I did a bit of fencing myself in my younger years.”

“Oh?” he wasn’t as familiar with the European fencing styles as he was kendo, but he knew enough about them to appreciate the art, “Which weapon?”

“Foil, of course,” she grinned, “If you’re going to stab someone, you should aim for the torso,” he laughed, and she chuckled too, “I was good, but not good enough to get very far competitively. Actually, Sanji’s been getting more into swordplay recently. He said one of his friends is a high ranking kendoka, but I’m guessing that’s you?”

“Uh, yeah,” he blushed a little at the thought of Sanji talking to his mom about him, specifically about his kendo.

“I’m glad he has friends that can help him branch out a little,” she squeezed his arm, “Is Reiju into your kendo at all?”

“Oh, uh, yeah, a bit,” he shrugged, not really sure how to answer, but he’d made it this far by winging it, “She watches me compete when she can, but she’s usually busy.”

“Yes,” she sighed, “She works too hard sometimes.”

He hummed, and they fell into a brief silence.

Sora adjusted her hat as she asked, “So, do you like working as a personal trainer?”

“It’s alright,” he shrugged, “I’m mostly focused on my swordsmanship right now, but there’s not a lot of paying kendo gigs around. Being a PT at least gives me access to training space and a steady paycheck.”

“And your clients? How are they?”

“Annoying, usually,” he grumbled, then remembered what Reiju went with for their first meeting and added, “But Reiju was great.”

“Good to know,” she laughed, light and airy, “Is that why you fell for her?”

“Uh, yeah,” he nodded, hoping she would just move onto the next topic.

But the universe didn’t seem to be listening to him, as her next question was, “So, what do you love about Reiju?”

He flashed back to Judge’s question the night before and grimaced, “I’m not after her money, if that’s what you’re wondering.”

She laughed loudly, “Of course not! I trust my daughter’s judgement more than that! I just,” she tapped her fingers on his arm as she thought about it, eventually coming up with, “I just want to know that my children are well loved. I asked the girls last night, but I haven’t gotten a chance to ask you yet.”

That seemed reasonable enough, and he frowned as he thought of his answer, “Well, she’s smart, and pretty,” but he knew those shallow answers weren’t going to cut it, and he struggled to come up with something else he could say about someone he met yesterday, “I like that she’s her own person. She doesn’t _need_ me, or any man, so the fact that I’m here means something, you know?”

She nodded, “Yes, but what do you _love_ , about her? What are the things about her that only she does and no one else can?”

“Uh,” he bit his lip as he mulled it over. Reiju was nice, and she’d been a fine fake girlfriend so far, but it didn’t change the fact that he didn’t love her, and any answer he gave here would be insincere at best. 

While he thought over the question and what possible response he could give, images of Sanji flashed through his mind, so he just went with it, “I love her smile. Like, when she actually honest to god smiles, it can just light up a room, and every time I see it I fall a little more in love.”

That seemed to be a good answer, as Sora was now beaming up at him. He racked his brain for something else and found that when he thought about Sanji instead, the answers flowed easily, “I love her eyes, how they’re so blue and bright and you could just, fall into them if you stare too long. I love when she talks about things that make her excited, and she just lights up like a star in the sky. I love how she never backs down from a challenge, even if the world is against her. I love that she’s strong, and she doesn’t always look it, but she’s one of the strongest people I’ve ever met, and she’s confident, she knows her strengths well and doesn’t back away from her weaknesses. I love how she lights up a room when she enters and somehow makes everything better just by being there, even if she doesn’t realize it.

“I love,” how the cigarette smoke scent clings to everything, and he hated it at first, but now he loves it, because it’s like having a little bit of Sanji with him at all times. He loved Sanji when he was happy and he loved making him happy, he loved him when he was angry and loved making him that too. He loved how Sanji kissed him like he could never get enough, making every kiss feel like the first one, how Sanji made love to him like he was the only thing that mattered, how Sanji loved him with everything he was and everything he had.

“I love how when we’re together, it’s like the rest of the world melts away, and we’re the only two people around.”

That may have been a bit too much. Even he was still surprised by the depth of what he felt for Sanji, and he just kinda dumped it all on his mom.

Zoro blushed, rubbed the back of his head, and said, “Ah, sorry.”

“You have absolutely nothing to be sorry about, Zoro Roronoa,” she leaned further into his side, “I’m glad my daughter is so well loved.”

He hummed in response, hating how guilty that comment made him feel, “Yeah…”

“That was easily the best answer I heard,” she squeezed his arm, “The other answers were great, don’t get me wrong. Nina and Fiona had fantastic answers, and of course Pudding’s was phenomenal, but yours was the best,” she grinned up at him, “Don’t tell the others.”

He couldn’t help but grin back, “Of course.”

Shortly after, the found the rest of the group. Zoro handed Sora off to her maid and he took Reiju’s arm instead as they walked through the rest of the festival.

* * *

The ice skating rink was always Sanji’s favorite part of the Winter Festival. His fondest childhood memories involved him sliding across the ice with his mom, her teaching him at first, but later just gliding together as a synchronized pair.

But this year she had left the festival early. Wandering out in the cold for so long wasn’t good for her health, and although she tried to stay, everyone insisted she go back and rest a bit before the party. 

So Sanji was going to have to be content skating with Pudding instead.

"No smoking on the ice," Pudding reminded him as she finished tying her skates and stood up.

"Oh, right," he put out his cigarette and stashed the butt in his pocket as he finished lacing up his own skates.

“Are you ready?” Pudding asked once he was done.

He glanced around at the rest of their group. Ichiji and Dani were already out on the ice, Niji was helping Nina tie her skates, Yonji and Fiona had gotten about halfway through getting their skates on before deciding that making out on the benches was a better idea, and Reiju was waiting with Zoro at the entrance to the rink.

“Yeah,” he smiled at her as he took her offered hand and stood up. Together they made their way over to the ice.

“Try not to trip and fall, Marimo,” Sanji taunted as they passed Reiju and Zoro.

“Hey, fuck you,” Zoro replied, clinging to the side wall.

He laughed as he and Pudding sped off across the ice.

He and Pudding were a perfect pair skating around on the ice. Even after all these years, they were still perfectly in sync, able to pick up on each others tempo changes with only looks and gestured. They were able to skate circles around his brothers, and Sanji even had the opportunity to body check Niji as he past him, giving him an insincere “Oh, sorry, didn’t see you there,” as they zoomed by.

It was perfect. Pudding was all he could ask for out of a skating partner.

His eyes kept finding Zoro and Reiju wherever they ended up. It was clear that Zoro had never skated before in his life, and was still struggling to find his balance on the ice. He had fallen at least three times already that Sanji had seen, and he made sure to tease him every time they passed. Even if he and Zoro were skating together, there was no way he’d be able to keep up with Sanji, so it was better this way, right?

But now Reiju was holding his hands, gently skating backward and helping him find his balance, laughing with mirth at his blushing face as he slowly got the hang of it. She leaned forward, whispering something in his ear, causing his face to break out in a grin.

That should be Sanji teaching him how to skate, Sanji holding his hands and showing him the motions, Sanji he should be sharing this moment with. An angry, jealous feeling bubbled in his gut as he looked away with a scowl.

He had no reason to be jealous, he _knew_ that. He _knew_ Zoro had no interest in women, and he _knew_ Reiju had no interest in Zoro. He was also the one who had asked Zoro to date Reiju in the first place, so he had no right to feel so jealous about it now.

But he was, and he hated it. He hated seeing them together, he hated seeing them happy, he hated himself for this ugly feeling when he only himself to blame for it.

“Ji-Ji,” Pudding’s use of his old childhood nickname brought him out of his dark musings as she touched his arm, her gaze towards Reiju and Zoro as well, “Do you think we can still pull off a lift?”

He grinned at her, “We can certainly try.”

They skated around until they found a clear enough space. Sanji took Pudding’s hand and turned her around until their chests were pressed against each other. His hands moved to her waist and he whispered in her ear, “Are you ready?”

She adjusted his hands a bit before nodding, “Yeah.”

He tightened his grip and lifted her gently into the air, just enough so her skates were off the ice. After he got used to her weight in his hands, he lifted her higher, his feet automatically shifting to a spread eagle position. When she was above his head, she gripped his shoulders tight until she found her own balance in the air, then she let go, trusting him to keep her airborne. 

Sanji glanced around, and when he was sure Zoro was watching he started spinning, managing to pull off three rotations before he lowered Pudding. When she was around halfway down she surprised him by wrapping her legs around his waist and clutching his shoulders. She grinned down at him and placed a light kiss right on his nose before releasing him and allowing herself to be placed gently back on the ice.

A small smattering a applause broke out amongst some of the onlookers as Sanji and Pudding grinned at each other, faces flushed from the cold and the exertion. Across the ice he heard Niji shout, “No one likes a show off!” but he didn’t really care, eyes darting around the ice for Zoro.

He eventually saw him, still skating arm in arm with Reiju, face darkening by the second. Well, good, he was trying to get that reaction out of him, right?

So why did he still feel like shit?

“Well,” Pudding said, looping her arm through his and leaning her head on his shoulder, “That was fun.”

“Sure,” he shrugged as they continued skating along.

When their time on the ice ended, they all skated off and back to the benches. Sanji tried to catch Zoro’s eye as he took off his skates, but he was refusing to look at him.

“Oh, look!” Nina exclaimed, clapping her hands as she pointed at something above Sanji’s head, “Sanji and Pudding are under the mistletoe!”

Sanji looked up and yeah, some nitwit had thought it was a good idea to hang a mistletoe up on one of the wooden beams over the benches. He looked back down at Pudding, who was grinning up at him, a mischievous glint in her eyes, “Uh-”

Before he could really say anything, Pudding cradled his face in her hands and brought their lips together.

He heard catcalls and hollering from his brothers and the sound of a door shutting as he pulled away. A quick look around showed that Zoro and Reiju were gone, but the bathroom door was still swinging with a bit more force than necessary. 

“I’ll be right back,” Sanji said, squeezing Pudding’s hand as he followed Zoro into the bathroom.

Zoro was standing at the sink with the water running, but he wasn’t touching it, just resting his hands along the side of the sink and leaning towards the mirror. His eyes were closed, and he was taking deep, measured breaths.

Sanji did a quick check of the stalls to confirm that they were alone before he approached Zoro, placing a gentle hand on his shoulder, “I’m sorry.”

Zoro grunted, not saying anything as his grip on the sink tightened. Sanji squeezed his shoulder and rubbed circles with his thumb, “It didn’t mean anything, it was just a dumb mistletoe kiss.”

“You love dumb mistletoe kisses,” Zoro said softly, his voice barely heard over the gushing water.

That was true, he did love dumb romantic stuff like that, and the number of times he’d tried to catch Nami and later Zoro under the mistletoe were numerous. But he only loved doing dumb romantic stuff with people he actually loved.

“It didn’t mean anything,” he repeated, hand moving to Zoro’s face and turn his head. When Zoro finally opened his eyes, he brought his other hand up to cradle his face and rubbed his thumbs across his cheekbones, “I didn’t want to kiss her.”

Zoro brought a hand up to cover his and sighed, “I hate this. I hate seeing you with her. I hate seeing you _smile_ at her. I hate that she can just put her hands all over you.”

“I know,” and part of him was still mad and jealous, but part of him was relieved that he wasn’t the only one being so affected by this. 

Zoro gazed at him, eyes sad and vulnerable, and in that moment Sanji wanted nothing more than to kiss him. He took a step forward and leaned in until their lips were only a breath apart, “Zoro, I-”

The bathroom door opened, and Sanji immediately pulled his hands away and took a step back. He turned on a second sink and began washing his hands just as Ichiji rounded the corner.

“Once Yonji and Fiona come up for air we’re heading back to the house,” he crossed his arms and leaned against the wall, “If you two would care to join us.”

Zoro grunted as he dried off his hands and exited the bathroom.

“Don’t get your shit in a twist,” Sanji said as he turned off his sink, “I’ll be right out.”

Ichiji grunted out a “Whatever” as he turned around and left.

Sanji dried off his hands and glanced at his reflection in the mirror, and hated what he saw. He should end the charade, tell his mom the truth, just face whatever her reaction would be and get it over with. But of course he wouldn't, because he was a coward.

What was it about going home that made him feel like absolute garbage?

He snarled at his reflection and left the bathroom.


	4. Make the Yuletide Gay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Vinsmokes throw their Christmas Eve party, and include some unwanted surprises.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Merry Late Christmas everyone! I should know better than to make promises about update times, because I never keep them. The new promise is that this will definitely be done before the end of winter maybe.
> 
> Also, general warning for homophobic language in this chapter.

Zoro turned the little wooden tiger over in his hands. The detail was impressive, the craftsmanship exquisite, and it was even painted green.

"Do you like it?" Reiju asked from where she was seated in front of her vanity applying mascara. The moth necklace Zoro had given her moments before dangled from her neck.

"Yeah," he said, turning it over once more before placing it in his bag, "Thanks."

She smiled at him in the mirror, "I got a duck for Sanji from the same stall. It's like you two have a matching set."

He smiled at the thought, digging around in his bag until he pulled out the box containing Sanji's cufflinks, "Do I really have to wear a suit to this thing?"

"Yes, absolutely," she put down the mascara and picked up her foundation, "I'm surprised you don't own one already."

"Not really a suit guy," he shrugged, putting the box in his pocket and heading for the door, "Sanji'll probably have something."

"Does Sanji dress you often?" Zoro paused and turned. Her smirk was just as mischievous as her brother's.

"He doesn't  _dress_  me," he sputtered out, completely indignant. He wasn't a  _child_ , he could dress himself, it was just, "Sometimes I need a certain look and he's just, he's better at picking it out."

Her smirk grew, and shit, Zoro didn't mean to admit that, "But I'm better than him at lots of other stuff," he crossed his arms and looked away, definitely not pouting, "More stuff even. I'm better at the best stuff."

"I'm sure," she said as she stood up and opened the door for him.

Zoro followed her out into the hallway and she grabbed his shoulders, forcefully turning him around.

"The stairs are that way. Just walk straight, you can't miss them," he turned to glare at her, but she just smiled and continued, "The first floor up is Ichiji's. The second floor up is Niji's. The third floor up is Sanji's. When you're climbing the stairs, just count up three floors, okay?"

"I can count to three!" the growled out.

"If you reach Yonji's floor, you've gone too far," she gave him a light shove forward, "Good luck."

She gave him a small wave and went back into her room.

How dare she, Zoro fumed as he stomped towards the stairs. She wasn't much better than him with directions. He could find Sanji's room easily.

Thirty minutes later he finally found the door with the giant yellow three on it and went inside.

Sanji was standing in front of the floor length mirror in his room, adjusting his pale yellow tie. He looked up when he heard the door open and smiled before going back to his task, "About time you got here."

"Shut up," he stepped forward and noticed a second suit laid out on the bed, "That for me?"

"Yeah. I stole it from Yonji. He probably won't notice, but don't let him know," he finished tying his tie and turned around, "You need help putting it on?"

Like sister like brother, "I can dress myself," he growled as he started stripping.

"Suit yourself," he shrugged and took a seat in a nearby chair, content to watch the show.

Zoro grumbled under his breath as he changed, a little self-conscious as Sanji's eyes followed him around the room. It wasn't like it was anything he hadn't seen before, but there was a heat in his gaze as his eyes ran up his body, an intensity in his stare as it locked on to every bit of skin that was revealed and traced over every scar that he knew was there, that made him shiver.

"Where's Pudding?" he asked as he finished buttoning up the shirt and picked up the dark green waistcoat with a dubious look.

"Getting ready in one of the guest rooms," Sanji said, and the knowledge that they were alone excited him.

Sanji's eyes narrowed as he tossed the waistcoat back on the bed, "You gotta wear that too."

Really? He was wearing so many layers already, and he still had the jacket to put on. How Sanji did this on a regular basis was beyond him, "Why?"

"It's a three piece suit, dumbass. You have to wear all three pieces," he stood up, grabbed the waistcoat, and pushed Zoro's shoulder until he was facing the mirror, "Arms out."

He frowned and did what he was told, holding his arms out to his side as Sanji tugged the waistcoat over his shoulders.

"There," he said, smoothing out the shoulders as Zoro buttoned it up, "Now you look presentable."

"Fuck you, I always look good," he grumbled as Sanji smirked at him in the mirror. His hands lingered on his shoulders for a bit before he slid them slowly down his back. He leaned back into the touch, and Sanji slid his hands around his front, pulling him into a tight hug.

"Yeah," he breathed into his neck, and Zoro could feel the goosebumps forming across his skin, "You do."

His hands moved to cover Sanji's, squeezing them tight as Sanji kissed his neck.

"Shit," he whispered in his ear, breath jostling his earrings, "I just got you into that suit and I already want to take it off."

Zoro inhaled sharply as Sanji's hands spread and wandered over his waistcoat. He let his fingers fall in between Sanji's and squeezed his hands tight, wanting nothing more than for Sanji to throw him on the bed and start taking these layers off.

"But," Sanji said, right in his ear, making him shiver as he leaned back into him more, "I know that if I do, you'll never put it back on."

With that, he pulled away from Zoro completely, leaving him standing awkwardly in the middle of the room, a little disoriented and very much frustrated.

"You fucking tease," he snarled as Sanji went over to the drawers and started digging around. Eventually he pulled out a dark green tie and tossed it at him.

"Put that on," he said as he wandered over to his bags and started rooting around in there.

After a few minutes of awkward fumbling he'd managed to get the tie looking decent enough in his opinion. Sanji came back over and paused, staring down at the knot he'd managed to make with a look of horror on his face.

"You're hopeless," he sighed, undoing the knot and tugging the tie away, "Or maybe you do it on purpose."

Before Zoro could react, Sanji had looped something else around his neck and pulled him in for a searing kiss that he opened up to and accepted eagerly. His hands ran down Sanji's sides until they settled on his waist, and he kissed him back with everything he was worth.

"Merry Christmas, Marimo," Sanji said as he pulled away and let go.

Zoro looked down at what he'd given him. It was a simple twine necklace, with a small bottle of water tied at the end of it. He picked up the bottle to find a small moss ball floating in the water and smiled, running his thumb over the jar as the moss ball bounced inside.

He looked back up at Sanji, "You still got me my bokken, right?"

"Yes," he rolled his eyes, "Your swords are at home, you'll get them when we go back. This is just, a little something special," he leaned in and tapped the bottle, "A marimo for my Marimo."

Sanji smiled at him, and it made his whole face softer, his gaze vulnerable as he looked at him, and Zoro felt his stomach flip as he fell just a little more for him.

"Do you like it?" he asked.

As a response, Zoro leaned forward and kissed him softly, cradling his face in his hand as Sanji opened up to him and his tongue slowly explored his mouth.

When they pulled apart, Zoro touched his forehead to Sanji's and said, "I love it."

And he did. It was the kind of dumb romantic gift that only Sanji would think of, and that made it all the more special.

Sanji grinned at him, tilting his head forward and giving him a light peck on his lips as he tucked the little marimo under Zoro's shirt. He picked up the tie he had dropped, looped it around Zoro's neck, and tied it properly.

He stepped back and took a look at his handiwork, a satisfied smirk on his face as he walked back towards the bed to grab the jacket.

Zoro took the opportunity to pick up the pants he'd tossed aside earlier and fished out his gift for Sanji. When he returned with his jacket, Zoro shoved the box in his face with a, "Here."

Sanji blinked in surprise, handing him the jacket while he took and opened the box. He smiled as he ran a finger over the cufflinks, then looked up at Zoro and said, "Did you get my pots?"

"Yes I got your damn pots," he grumbled as he slipped on the jacket, eyes falling to the box, "Just a little something special."

Sanji's gaze softened as he stepped forward and kissed Zoro sweetly.

"Thank you," he said as he pulled away, already taking off his jacket to put the cufflinks on, "I love them."

"You don't have to wear them right now," he said, but Sanji had already inserted one and was rolling up his shirt cuff to do the other.

"They're a gift from my boyfriend," Sanji said as he locked the second one in place, "Of course I'm wearing them now."

Zoro grinned wide and took a step forward, hand reaching out for him.

Just then the door to the room burst open, causing them to jump away from each other as Yonji came in.

"Three, do you have my socks?" he asked.

"Why the fuck would I have your socks?" Sanji said as he threw his jacket back on.

Zoro tried not to pout as he turned back towards the mirror and adjusted his tie, making sure the bulge from the marimo's jar was covered.

"Do you have any socks?" he said as he flopped down on the bed, "All mine are missing." He looked over and finally noticed Zoro, "Oh, hey, what are you doing here? You need socks too?"

"Idiot can't tie a tie," Sanji responded, subtly kicking Zoro's clothes under the bed as he chucked a pair of socks at Yonji's head, "Now go away."

He caught the socks as they bounced off his head, and raised an eyebrow at Zoro, "Is that my suit?"

"Is it?" Zoro asked, tugging at the jacket a little, "It's a bit tight."

"Can't be mine then," he bounced the socks off his hand as he walked to the door, "Later haters."

Once he was gone he looked back towards Sanji, who was adjusting his sleeves under his jacket. He stepped forward into his space, but Sanji looked away.

"You should," he paused, running a thumb across the cufflinks before he sighed and said, "You should probably go back to Reiju now."

"Oh, right," he glanced down at the cufflinks on Sanji's wrist, reaching out to stroke his hand as he leaned in and kissed his cheek.

He pulled away and looked at Sanji. The last thing in the world he wanted to do was go, and from the look on his face the last thing Sanji wanted to do was let him go.

But Sanji took a deep breath and stepped away, so all Zoro could do was give him a brief, "See you later," as he left the room and tried to find his way back to Reiju.

* * *

Reiju was parading Zoro around the party like some sort of show dog, introducing him to people whose names he instantly forgot. It was seriously starting to piss him off.

"Relax," Reiju said, stroking his arm, and that only succeeded in riling him up more.

"Why do I have to meet all these people?" he grumbled, eyes darting to Sanji. While he'd been friendly and greeted a few people so far, it hadn't been nearly as many as Zoro and Reiju.

"I'm Judge Vinsmoke's only daughter and one of the heirs to Germa Group," she explained as she guided him away, "As my escort for this evening, it's important people know who you are."

That was so stupid. Rich people were dumb. He never would have agreed to this if he knew this was part of the deal.

Reiju must have sensed his growing frustration, as she leaned up, kissed his cheek, and said, "Why don't we take a break? Go get something to eat."

Zoro was all too happy to agree, and he left Reiju to find the nearest server.

As he was stuffing his face with shrimp puffs, someone said "Hey, Zoro!" and hugged him from behind. He fought the urge to immediately fight back and instead turned to see who his attacker was.

"Rebecca!" he looked down at the girl with surprise. This was the last place in the world he expected to run into one of Luffy's friends, "What are you doing here?"

"My cousin was invited, and she brought me as her plus one," she grinned as she pulled away, "Is Sanji here?"

"Yeah," he glanced around the room, but was having trouble locating him, "Somewhere."

"Right here, actually," Sanji said, grabbing Rebecca's hand and kissing the back of it, "It's wonderful to see you again, Rebecca, as always."

Rebecca giggled, and once he let go of her hand she leaped forward to hug him as well, "Always a pleasure, Sanji."

Sanji pulled away with a grin, holding back a glass of champagne so it didn't spill, "You grow more beautiful each time I see you."

"Stop, you big flirt," she playfully smacked his arm, "Have you seen Viola yet? She was looking for you."

"Viola's here?" he perked up, his head swiveling around the room.

Zoro crossed his arms and frowned. That's right, Sanji and Rebecca's cousin dated for a bit, "Excited to see your ex, Cook?"

He blushed and grinned at him sheepishly, "I, well, it's been a while and," he froze mid sentence, face growing pale as his eyes went wide, "I need to find her before Pudding does."

He absently handed Zoro his champagne flute and hurried off.

"Wow, Pudding's here? Weren't they like high school sweethearts or something?" Rebecca laughed and nudged her elbow into his ribs, "Two exes in in the same room as his boyfriend. Must be super awkward for you."

"Yeah," he sighed, eyes trailing after Sanji as he found Viola. They were talking animatedly, and he noticed the glint of Sanji's cufflinks every time he gestured. He reached up and touched the marimo bottle hidden underneath his shirt as he finished Sanji's champagne, "It's a little weird."

"Uh-oh, here comes trouble.," Rebecca said as Pudding walked up to Sanji and looped his arm around his.

"How dare she! Doesn't she know Sanji's with you now?" She fumed, and started towards them, "I'm gonna set her straight."

Zoro could see how that was going to end, and it was not good. He grabbed her wrist and said, "Don't, it's fine."

"Fine?" she gestured at them, "You and Sanji are the epitome of true love and she's putting her hands all over him. If you're not going to tell her what's what, I will."

He appreciated how offended she was getting on his behalf, Luffy did always manage to find the best people, but now wasn't the time, "It's fine. It's, it's just pretend."

She gave him a incredulous look, "What."

He placed the champagne flute down on the nearby table and ran a hand over his face, "It's complicated. Just, the Vinsmokes don't know about Sanji and me and we're trying to keep it that way."

"Ugh, it's the 21st century, isn't homophobia dead yet?" she pouted and crossed her arms, "Terrible."

"Yeah," he sighed. Sanji glanced over his way and he caught the panicked look of embarrassment on his face. He imagined how he would feel if their situations were reversed, if he was stuck talking to two of his exes as Sanji looked on. He was not on speaking terms with any of his exes, so that right there would be terrible, and with Sanji judging from the sidelines he could only imagine how awkward that would be for both of them, "It sucks."

A server passed by carrying a tray of champagne. Zoro grabbed two and offered one to Rebecca.

"I'm not twenty one yet," she said.

"I don't think anyone here cares," he pointed out, handing he the glass

"True," she said, holding her glass out, "To awkward situations."

"I can drink to that," Zoro laughed and clinked their glasses together and took a sip.

Just then, Reiju returned, sliding up beside him and wrapping her arm around his, "Who's your friend?"

"Oh," he pointed at Rebecca with his glass, "This Rebecca Riku. Rebecca, this is Sanji's sister, Reiju Vinsmoke."

"Oh, nice to meet you," Rebecca said, shaking her hand, "This is a great party your having. Thank you for inviting me."

"Thank you for coming," Reiju smiled at her, "Sorry, but I need to steal him for a moment."

"Yeah, sure."

Without waiting for Zoro's response, Reiju dragged him away.

"Who is she?" she asked as Zoro took another sip of champagne.

"Rebecca? Just a friend of a friend," he smirked at her, "Why? Jealous?"

She rolled her eyes, the smile slipping from her face, "How much does she know?"

"She knows about me and Sanji," she frowned, so he clarified, "She already knew about me and Sanji. She doesn't know about you."

"Will she tell anyone?"

"Probably not."

She stopped and stared at him, " _Probably_?"

Zoro was yanked back by the arm she still had in her grasp and glared at her, "What?"

"I know you don't particularly care if this whole charade becomes exposed," she said, eyes darkening as she leaned in closer, "When this whole thing is over, you can just go back to your friends and your life. But this is my life. I still have to see these people once this is over. I still have reputation to keep," she grabbed on to his shoulder and hissed in his ear, "And you're asking me to bet all that on a probably?"

"I'm not here to out you," he hissed back, "I agreed to do this and I'm trying to play my role as best I can. Rebecca's a good kid," he tugged at his arm to get them moving again, but she wasn't budging, "I told her we were keeping it a secret, so she will too. If I thought there was a risk involved with her being here I would have had her leave."

Reiju closed her eyes and inhaled deeply.

"It's fine, I trust her," he reassured her and tugged once more, "Can we just go meet whoever you want me to meet and get this over with?"

She exhaled and opened her eyes, "Alright. If you trust her, then I'll trust you."

"Thank you."

She nodded and continued leading him through the throng of people.

"Oh, Zoro! Reiju!" Nina waved them over from where she was standing with Niji and a tall man with long dark hair tied back in a ponytail, "Come and meet Daddy!"

Zoro winced and tried to ignore them and walk away, but Reiju's grip on his arm was tight as she guided them over there.

"Daddy, this is Niji's older sister Reiju and her boyfriend Zoro Roronoa. Aren't they adorable?" she smiled as she leaned on her dad's arm, "Reiju, Zoro, this is my daddy."

"Far out," her dad said as he shook both of their hands, "Digging the earrings, man. Really ties your whole rebel look together, yeah?"

"Uh, thanks," he said, touching his earrings.

"Nina's been like, telling me so much about you guys. I'm surprised one of the Vinsmokes found love so outside their social circle, but I guess the heart wants what the heart wants, you know?" he clapped them both on the shoulder, "I'm happy for you, man."

"Yes, I've heard much about you as well, Mr. Labrinna," Reiju said with a smile as she carefully removed his hand.

"Oh, right on," he laughed, "But like, Mr. Labrinna was my dad. My friends call me Nat and we're like, so friends now. "

As he started talking to Reiju more, Zoro felt the hair on the back of his neck rise. He looked around and saw Ichiji and Dani talking to a couple with flaming red hair the same shade as Dani's. Ichiji seemed to be engaging Dani's father in an intense discussion, but Dani's gaze was focused only on Zoro.

Just as he was starting to get uncomfortable, she excused herself from the group, giving Zoro a subtle head tilt to follow her.

Curious, he turned to Reiju to see if it was alright to leave, and found that she'd already let go of his arm. Taking that as all the permission he needed, he finished the rest of his champagne, placed the empty glass on the table, and followed after her.

The hallways of the mansion were so twisted, that he found himself quite a bit away from the main party. He sighed, wondering what that had been all about, as he tried to find his way back.

He turned a corner and found Dani there, looking almost as startled to see him as he was to see her.

"So," he said, leaning against the wall, "What's up?"

"I believe you know precisely what is happening here."

He really didn't, but before he could process what she was doing, she slammed him against the wall, pinning his wrists above his head, "W-what the-?"

"Shh," she placed a finger over his lips, effectively silencing him as she leaned in closer, "No words," she leaned in and nuzzled his face.

Internally, Zoro was freaking out. This was the second time in two days that one of Sanji's brother's girlfriends had made such an obvious move on him, which was two more girls than he was used to. What the hell was he supposed to do?

"Um," he said, freeing on of his hands as her hand found its way into his hair and she nibbled her way up his chin, "Aren't you with Ichiji?"

"Hmph," she exhaled against his skin, causing him to reel back as much as he could, "Ichiji. So tame. So controlled," she stroked his face, "He's got nothing on you, so wild, so  _unpredictable_ ," she practically purred into his ear.

He scrambled behind him, looking for something, anything, to help him out of this as his last two brain cells tried to come up with something to say, "I, uh, well…"

"Ichiji is safe," Dani continued, tugging on his tie, "Ichiji is the kind of boy you bring home to your parents and end up marrying," her eyes darted towards his, and all the blood drained from his face, "He's not the kind of boy you fuck."

He inhaled sharply in an attempt to get his bearings, "Reiju…"

"Gets it, I'm sure," Dani scoffed as she mouthed her way towards his lips, "Extramarital affairs are quite common amongst families of our caliber after all. She most likely already has one or two of her own."

Just as she sealed her lips over his, Zoro found a doorknob behind him. He quickly turned it and pressed back, opening the door to what turned out to be a closet and stumbled inside.

"Oh perfect," Dani practically purred as she followed him in. He turned his head away, and she continued nibbling across his neck, "No one will find us here."

Zoro staggered backwards, trying to get some space between them, but Dani just followed his lead as they fell further into the closet. Shit, how the hell was he going to get out of this mess?

"Uh," a voice said from the doorway. They both turned and saw Sanji standing there awkwardly against the still open door, "What's going on here?"

Zoro had never been more relieved to see him ever in his life. Dani awkwardly stumbled away from him, fixing her appearance as she turned to face Sanji.

"Nothing, nothing at all," she said in a high pitched voice, eyes darting to Zoro before she stepped briskly out of the closet, "If you'd excuse me."

She left quickly, giving Zoro a chance to catch his breath, "Thanks for the save."

Sanji hummed as he stepped forward, "You've got to stop this."

"Stop what?"

The next second Sanji had shut the closet door and pinned Zoro up against it, "Being too irresistible to resist."

And then Sanji was kissing him, and Zoro really didn't mind being violated if Sanji was the one doing the violating, so he kissed him back and then some.

Sanji groaned as he pulled away, "Stop," he said, biting at his earrings and doing everything but stopping.

"Stop what?" Zoro asked, breathing heavily, not knowing exactly what was going on but liking the direction it was heading.

"You're hard enough to resist in a suit," he said, stepping back and dragging Zoro with him by his tie. His hand brushed up against the hidden marimo and pressed it further into Zoro's chest, "How am I supposed to resist you in a disheveled suit?

That wasn't something he was prepared to argue with, so he cradled Sanji's head in his hand and kissed him with everything he was worth.

Sanji groaned into the kiss and eagerly opened up, accepting everything Zoro was offering as he moved from his lips to his neck.

"Zoro," he moaned as Zoro nibbled his way down his neck, his hands sliding down his sides until one rested on his waist and the other grabbed his ass. Sanji's hand found its way under his jacket and started playing with the buttons on his waistcoat as the other dug into his hair. He lifted his leg to wrap around his waist, bringing them even closer.

Yes, Zoro thought, finally.

Suddenly light hit his eyes, almost blinding him as the closet door was open a second time.

Sanji froze in his arms, and Zoro turned to glare at whoever was intruding on this moment.

"Uh," Fiona said from the doorway. She stared at the two of them before slowly shutting the door.

"Closet's locked, Babe," he heard her say from the other side, "We'll have to go somewhere else."

Sanji was shaking in his arms, his touch going from needy and desperate to clawing and frantic in mere moments.

"Hey," Zoro whispered in his ear, trying to comfort him as he curled up further into himself.

"I can't believe," he heard Sanji mutter as he clung to him like a lifeline, "So  _stupid_."

"You're  _fine_ ," he said with a little more force, "She won't tell anyone."

Sanji buried his face into his shoulder, "You don't know that."

"I don't, no," he admitted as he held him closer, "But she could have told Yonji right there, and she didn't, so that's something."

He focused on rubbing circles into Sanj's back as he calmed down. Eventually, after a few deep breaths, he got himself together and pulled away.

He stared at Sanji for a bit, brushing the stray hair away from his face, and he said, "I'll go talk to her, if you want."

Sanji captured his hand in his own, "It's fine," he said, rubbing circles into his knuckles, "I'll do it. It's my family and my secret, I should do it."

"If you're sure."

He nodded, and Zoro leaned in and kissed his forehead.

Sanji took a deep breath and made his way to the door. Before he opened it, he turned around and said, "Wait a bit, before you come out. Get yourself presentable again."

Zoro nodded, already fiddling with his tie.

Before he could say anything else, Sanji had stepped out of the closet and back into the real world.

* * *

It took some time before Sanji was able to catch Fiona away from Yonji.

She had just placed her empty champagne flute on a server's tray when he walked up to her and held out his hand, "May I have this dance, Mademoiselle?"

Her eyes darted between his hand and his face before she looked away, "Um, I don't think-"

"Please," he insisted.

She looked back at him, sighed, and took his hand.

Sanji led her out onto the dance floor, guiding her around until they were in a spot no one could overhear them.

"About what you saw earlier," he started. She stiffened a little in his arms, but he pressed on, "Did you tell anyone?"

She gripped his hand tight and snarled, "You're despicable, you know that?"

He felt sick, the blood draining from his face as he looked away. It wasn't like he hadn't dealt with that kind of attitude before. Hell, he'd had that attitude towards himself for years, and it was only after meeting Luffy and the others that he had learned to accept his bisexuality for what it was and not be ashamed of it. Still, hearing those words spoken aloud always put him on edge and revived memories and feelings he didn't want to think about.

"I have no patience or sympathy for cheaters," Fiona hissed, and Sanji's eyes went wide as he looked back at her, "Let alone someone who would hurt his own family like that. Reiju is your sister! How could you fuck around with her boyfriend behind her back?"

Oh, yes, well. That wasn't where he was expecting this conversation to go, but from an outside perspective it probably did look something like that, "I, uh-"

"And what about Pudding?" she barreled on, completely ignorant of the emotional rollercoaster he was currently on, "She's crazy about you, you know? And you can just, betray her trust like that? You're the worst kind of scum."

Sanji had no idea what the appropriate reaction was for this. The whole situation just left him speechless.

"And then you have the cast iron balls to tell me to keep me mouth shut about the whole thing," she shook her head and glared at him, "You really are something. But no, I haven't told anyone, yet."

He felt a weight leave his chest, "Fiona, please-"

"But you can bet your pathetic ass I'm going to tell Pudding and Reiju."

"That's fair," and if they were the only two people she told that would be the best possible outcome. He should probably just tell her the whole truth and try to explain, but he couldn't think of a way to do that without outing Reiju and Pudding in the process. No matter what she currently thought of him and Zoro, he didn't feel right doing that to them, "Just, please don't tell anyone else, especially Yonji."

Her glare intensified, "Why shouldn't I? Why shouldn't I tell everyone?"

His eyes went wide, anxiety pounded in his chest and his steps faltered as she continued, "Give me one good reason why I shouldn't let Yonji know what a complete sack of shit his brother is."

And the only thing he could think to say to that was the truth.

"Because Yonji doesn't know I'm bi," he stared directly into her eyes and tried to convey the urgency of his request through just that, "None of the others do."

She was visibly taken aback, and she bit her lip before saying, "He wouldn't care about something like that."

"I respectfully disagree," he squeezed her hand, "And even if he did, the whole coming out thing, its personal. It should be my choice who finds out and when. If you want to tell Pudding and Reiju that's fine, they already know I'm bi, but please don't out me to the rest of my family."

The song ended, and the both took a step back.

"I don't like this, I'm not the kind of person who sits back and lets men betray women they claim to care about, especially ones I consider friends," she sighed, "But I'm also not the kind of asshole that outs people."

"Thank you," he said sincerely, his heart skipping a beat with pure relief.

"But," she stepped forward and poked him hard in the chest, "You better end it with Zoro tonight or I will tell Pudding."

Before he could respond, she walked off.

So his secret was once again safe from the Vinsmokes, but a beautiful lady thought Sanji was the lowest of the low and was cheating on his fake girlfriend with his real boyfriend. Par for the course for his life really, so he was just going to count it as a win.

He brushed his finger along his cufflinks as he looked around the rest of the party.

Suddenly Pudding was there, snagging his wayward hands as she smiled up at him, "Care for a dance?"

He had been trying to avoid her most of the night, still haunted by the look on Zoro's face at the skating rink, but it would raise questions if he didn't at least dance with her, "With you, always."

He let Pudding lead him back out onto the dance floor, spinning them around in that graceful way she always seemed to manage.

"Is it weird for you, with Viola being here and all?" she asked, "I mean, you two were a thing not too long ago, right?"

"Oh, uh, yeah, we dated a bit," but they'd ended it about two years ago, a few months before he started dating Zoro, so he wasn't sure why she was bringing it up, "It's not really that weird, for me at least. Maybe for Zoro."

"Hm," she frowned, "It's just, you were talking before like you were friends."

"Well, yeah, we're still friends," he shrugged as best he could while still maintaining the slow rhythm of their dancing, "Our break-up was pretty amicable."

"Really?" she asked, a slight edge to her gaze, "How so?"

"It's just, we were after different things. I wanted something more serious but she was looking for something casual." It hurt, of course, break-ups hurt, but they'd talked about it and both realized that they were going in different directions, so they decided to end it before they both got in too deep, "Ending it was a mutual decision, so we were still able to keep our friendship when all was said and done."

"Hm," she glanced away for a second before looking back at him, "Do you think you and Zoro would still be friends if you broke up."

His steps faltered for a bit, his heart beating rapidly in his chest at the thought, "I, I don't know."

They were friends before they'd started dating, and they did have the same group of friends and run with the same people. But he was so in love with Zoro that the thought of not being with him romantically physically hurt. Would he be able to go to a friendly gathering and see Zoro there and know he couldn't leave with him? What if Zoro started seeing someone else and he started bringing him along? Sanji could barely handle seeing Zoro fake a relationship with his sister, how could he possible deal with Zoro actually with someone else?

He shook his head. This was all hypothetical. He was getting himself worked up over nothing.

"I haven't thought about it," he said to Pudding.

"Oh, really?" she said, surprised, "Huh."

He raised an eyebrow, "What?"

"No," she shook her head, "It's nothing."

The song played on, and Sanji waited a moment before he asked, "You don't, really like Zoro, do you?"

She blushed, "Is it that obvious?" Sanji nodded and she sighed, "I'm usually better at hiding things."

"Yeah," he agreed, twirling her a little as he continued, "I mean, he's a good guy underneath it all.'

"I'm sure he is," she leaned in a little closer to him and said, "I came here expecting not to like him, and I don't, but it's not for the reasons I thought. I just have some stuff to figure out, and Zoro's caught in the middle," she pouted at him, "So stop trying to make me like him."

He wanted to ask her more about it, maybe offer an ear if she needed someone to listen, but the look in her eye told him she'd rather not talk about it, "Okay."

The song ended, and he guided Pudding away from the dance floor to join the rest of the party.

* * *

A few hours later found him sitting at a table with his mom, Viola, Rebecca, Niji, and Nina. Niji and Nina were having their own private discussion while Rebecca was going into a detailed description of what sounded like Luffy's last birthday party. Sanji was content to just sip his champagne and listen.

"And there was so much food, of course," Rebecca was saying, "Like, I'd never seen that much food in my life. Sanji made it all, right?" she turned to him.

"Oh, yeah," he swirled his champagne. Luffy had requested a barbecue, but when Sanji asked what meat he wanted for the barbecue, he just said all of it. So Sanji, being a sarcastic shit, brought and barbecued whatever meat he could find. Luffy was thrilled.

"You cooked for so many people?" his mom asked, "Wasn't that hard?"

He shrugged, "The amount of people wasn't the challenge, it was just keeping Luffy fed," he took a sip of his champagne, "That boy's stomach is a black hole."

The others laughed, and Rebecca dug out her phone, "Oh, wait, I have pictures."

As she leaned over to show his mom, Viola poked at his hand. He turned his attention towards her as she said, "You look good."

"Oh," he blushed and smiled a little, "Thanks. You look absolutely stunning."

And she did. She'd always been gorgeous of course, but there was a certain glow about her tonight that just made her shine.

"Thank you," she laughed, "The restaurant's doing good?"

"Yeah, the Baratie's great," he took another sip of champagne and leaned forward, "How's your dancing going?"

"Very well," she said, sipping her own champagne, "I've been traveling a lot as part of a troupe, but recently I've been offered a solo opportunity at-"

"Hey wait," Niji said suddenly from where he was looking at Rebecca's phone, "What's that?"

"Nothing," she said, quickly sliding her finger across the phone screen.

"That looked like something," he said, reaching across to tap at her phone, "That looked like Sanji and Zoro."

Sanji froze, ice running through his veins as he turned his attention towards the other side of the table.

What had they been talking about, Luffy's party? He'd spent most of the party by the barbecue. Was Zoro there? Of course Zoro was there he was Luffy's best friend, and he'd spent most of the party hanging around Sanji by the barbecue. They must have hugged or kissed or something right? A few times? What exactly did Rebecca get on her phone? How bad was it? Why did she have it at all?

Niji and Rebecca fought over the phone, causing it to slip out of both of their grips and land on the table right in front of his mother. On the phone screen was a picture of him and Zoro at the barbecue at Luffy's party, Zoro hugging him from behind as they kissed, both clearly enjoying it.

"Hey, Yonji," Niji shouted across the room, a wicked grin on his face, "Come look at this!"

Fuck.

He heard Nina gasp and Niji's "What the hell," but his focus was on his mom and her reaction. She was staring at the picture, eyes wide with the most heartbreaking expression he'd ever seen on her. Slowly, she looked up at him.

"Sanji…"

Sanji couldn't handle this, he couldn't be here right now, didn't really want to be anywhere but he sure as shit didn't want to be here. Before anyone could say anything else, he'd bolted out of his seat and got as much distance as he could between him and the table.

He didn't know where he was heading, but he found himself in the kitchen. It was thankfully empty, so he sat down at the counter and cradled his head in his hands as he tried to figure out what to do next.

What the hell was he supposed to do now? He could try and deny it, but it was impossible to deny it when the evidence was right there and irrefutable. He could try and explain it, but what good would that do when the explanation was the problem. There was no clever strategy left to him, no quick thinking or right thing to say to make it all go away. There was nothing he could do.

The secret was out. Everybody knew.

He heard someone enter the kitchen and tensed up, heart pounding in his chest as they stepped closer. He was still nowhere near ready for an actual confrontation.

"Of course you'd hide in the kitchen," Zoro said, and he relaxed immediately. He sat down next to him and put an arm around his shoulders.

He leaned into the touch, taking comfort in it even as his brain was going a million miles a minute.

Eventually his thoughts turned from himself to his sister. Sure the picture had nothing to do with her, but now people will wonder why she had shown up to Christmas with Zoro, and they might figure out her secret too. He mumbled into the counter, "You shouldn't have left Reiju. People might suspect-"

"She can take care of herself," he kissed the top of his head, "I'm not leaving you when you're like this."

Gratitude washed over him in a comforting wave, but it still wasn't enough to erase the guilt. Not only had he fucked up and exposed himself, he might have exposed Reiju and Pudding, and the consequences for them could be far worse than anything he'd face.

"I fucked up," he groaned, burying his face into the counter and clenching his hands in his hair.

"S'not your fault," he said, rubbing circles into his shoulder with his thumb.

He closed his eyes and focused on breathing, inhaling and exhaling in time with Zoro's rubbing, trying to calm down to a state where he could think rationally again.

Suddenly the door burst open, and Sanji was already curling into himself before Judge even started shouting, "The fuck kind of games do you think you're playing at?"

Zoro's hand tightened on his shoulder as his fingernails dug into his scalp.

"You've always been a disappointment and a fuck-up, but this is a new low, even for you," he snarled, "You leave home and instead of making something of yourself, you come back a disgusting fag."

Sanji was shaking all over. His heart was beating so loudly in his ears he was sure Zoro could hear it too, and his breath was only coming in panicked gasps. He could barely feel Zoro's touch now as Judge's words sunk further into him.

"So what is this? Just one more shot at me? You haven't ruined this family enough by your mere existence?" he slammed a fist on the counter, causing Sanji to jump, "Answer me! You useless, miserable failure!"

"Hey!" Zoro snarled, "You don't get to talk to him like that!"

Judge growled, "You stay out of this you two-timing little-"

"You don't get to talk to me like that either!" he slammed his hands on the table, "You think your opinion matters here? You're just a twisted old man who's obsessed with power! When you find something you can't control you try to break it! Well you sure as shit can't control me, and you couldn't control Sanji either! He doesn't need you or your approval, he never did! And that just eats you up doesn't it, you shit-eating fuck."

"I will not be spoken to in that way in my own house!" he thundered, "Get out! Both of you faggots, right now! Go, and don't come back!"

"Fine!"

"Don't."

Sanji lifted his head off the counter as his mom entered the kitchen. She stood in the doorway, gripping the doorframe tight but with her head held high and gaze steady, the picture of poise and grace. He could see his brothers lingering in the hallway behind her, but he only had eyes for her.

"No one is getting kicked out," she said, and her tone held no room for argument.

"But-" Judge tried anyway.

Sora glared at him with enough force to silence him completely, "It's Christmas Eve."

He felt hope bubble up in his chest. Maybe his mom wouldn't hate him, maybe she still loved him and would accept him, maybe-

"What would the guests think?"

The bubble popped, and he was left feeling colder and more miserable than he had before. Of course, it was all about their reputation. Of course it would look bad if her son was thrown out into the cold night on Christmas. Of course she could never accept him for who he was. Of course she couldn't love a fucked up failure like him. His stomach turned inside out and he almost wanted to puke. As he sunk further into his seat, he felt Zoro's hand on his shoulder once more.

"We'll leave in the morning," Zoro said as he pulled him to his feet and escorted him out of the kitchen before anyone said anything else.

Sanji didn't really care where Zoro was taking him. He was numb all over, the shock of everything still setting in, so he was surprised when he felt his knees hit something and he fell on his bed.

He looked down to find Zoro taking off his shoes. When he was done, he moved to the buttons on his jacket, but Sanji knocked his hand away and worked on those himself. Zoro walked away, and he found he only really had enough energy to strip down to just his shirt and pants before he just collapsed onto the bed and threw his arm over his eyes.

After what felt like hours but couldn't have been more than a few minutes, Zoro got into the bed next to him. He wrapped an arm around his waist and kissed his neck softly, whispering into his ear, "It's gonna be okay."

Sanji's breath hitched, and he could feel tears streaming down his face past his arm. He turned over on his side and Zoro went with him, holding him close to his chest and nuzzling the back of his neck.

"You'll be okay," he said as he kissed the back of his neck.

Sanji closed his eyes and hoped those words were true.

* * *

Zoro stared at Sanji's back, drawing random patterns into his sides with his finger. He'd finally managed to fall asleep, but Zoro was still too keyed up to even try.

He knew Sanji had issues. Hell, who didn't have issues, he knew he his own baggage was quite hefty. But when he remembered the way Judge yelled at him and how Sanji just shriveled up on himself, he had a good guess where most of Sanji's came from.

He thought back to every time Sanji sacrificed his own well-being for someone else, or shouldered all the blame for someone else's problems, or when he focused on being  _needed_  and  _useful_  instead of loved, and the anger burned hot under his skin. How dare he treat Sanji that way. How dare he hurt him like that. How dare he make him think he's  _less_ , that he's not enough.

Zoro wanted to kill him. He wanted nothing more than to punch him and keep punching him until he stopped breathing. But that would most likely end up with Zoro in jail, and it wouldn't really help Sanji at all.

Instead he held Sanji close, trying his best to comfort him with just his presence. He leaned over to kiss his temple and muttered, "I'm sorry," into his skin.

He didn't really know what he was apologizing for. Not being there for him before maybe, but he hadn't even known Sanji when he lived here, and he wasn't one to be caught up on vague what ifs. Maybe he was just sorry any of this ever happened to him at all.

He thought about what Sora had said too, about that cold, distant look on her face and how she couldn't even look at Sanji. He couldn't believe that she'd reject her own son over something so trivial. If she really was like Sanji though, then maybe-

There was a soft knock on the door, interrupting his thoughts. He hesitated, not wanting to leave Sanji's side even if he was already asleep, but curiosity and the possibility of punching someone won out, so he crawled out of the bed and answered the door.

Reiju was there, arms crossed in front of her and looking beyond tired, "How is he?"

Zoro leaned against the doorway, "Sleeping."

He was still a little peeved at her, remembering how she'd tried to stop him from going after Sanji when he left the party in a panic, more concerned with preserving her own secret than making sure her brother wasn't falling to pieces.

She sighed and looked away, "Rebecca feels just awful about the whole thing."

That's right, he had been too busy comforting Sanji to deal with Rebecca, "Is she still here?"

She shook her head, "Her cousin left with her shortly after," she trailed off and waved her hand in a vague gesture, "Anyway, she wants you to know she's sorry, and she'll understand if you never want to see her again."

"It wasn't her fault," he sighed, running a hand across his face, "I don't blame her, and neither does he. I'll talk to her later and get everything sorted out."

"Good," she nodded, and they fell into silence.

More to fill the eerie quiet then out of curiosity, he asked, "Where's Pudding?"

"She's staying in one of the guest rooms."

That was surprising. Zoro tilted his head, "Not with you?"

"No," she looked up, "May I come in?"

He considered not letting her in, just closing the door and heading back to Sanji, but in the end he stepped aside.

"Thank you," she said, closing the door behind her.

The room was dark, the only light coming from the faint moonlight the streaked through the balcony windows, but he could still see a look of apprehension on her face, "Is everything alright?"

"Yes, well, as alright as it could be," she took a deep breath and exhaled slowly, "Um, we did manage to keep our relationship a secret. Pudding's story was that Sanji called her up and asked her to fake being his girlfriend for the weekend since Mom was expecting him to bring one. I said I'd recently broken up with my boyfriend, and rather than admit it, asked Sanji if I could borrow his boyfriend for the weekend."

"Well as long as your secret's safe," he spat out and crossed his arms, "That's the least of my worries right now."

"I know," she sighed, "And I'm sorry. You were right to go look after him, I was just," she bit her lip, "I panicked, and I fell into old habits, trying to protect only myself while letting Sanji suffer. I shouldn't," she paused, wiping at a stray tear from her eye, "Even after all this time I still can't help him."

He thought back to how Judge had shouted at Sanji. It didn't seem likely the others were able to escape Judge's wrath unscathed, and he wondered just how much abuse the rest of the Vinsmoke siblings suffered over the years.

"How is he really?" Reiju asked.

"M'fine," Sanji said, startling both of them as he turned over on the bed, "Don't worry about it."

As he sat up, she walked over and wrapped her arms around him in a tight hug, "I'm sorry."

"S'not your fault," he hugged her back, "We're the ones that got exposed."

"That wasn't your fault," she squeezed tightly before she pulled away and stood up, "I don't blame you at all."

"Right," he sighed and looked away.

"Hey," she ran a hand through his hair as he looked back up at her, "I don't care what the others say. I love you, no matter who you love. You'll always be my little brother."

Sanji leaned forward, resting his head against her stomach as he wrapped his arms around her again, "Thank you."

They stayed like that for a moment before pulling away.

Reiju ruffled his hair and said, "Get some rest."

He nodded, already falling back on the bed as she walked to the door.

Zoro walked with her, stopping at the doorway.

She turned back and looked at him, "You know, you're the best boyfriend I've ever had."

Despite everything else going on, he chuckled, "You're not the worst girlfriend either."

She grinned, leaning forward and kissing his cheek, "Thank you, Zoro. For everything."

Zoro smiled as she left, closing the door behind her as he climbed back into bed with Sanji.

"Hey Zoro?" Sanji said as he buried his face into his chest, "Thanks for coming."

Zoro leaned in and kissed him softly, "Anytime."


	5. All the Plans that We've Made

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone deals with the fallout from last night in their own way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know what it is about the last chapter that always gives me writer's block, but I finished it in less then a month, so that's a win.
> 
> Thank you to everyone who left kudos and comments and read and liked this silly story of mine! You're the real winners here!

Sanji was up early the next morning. His sleep had been inconsistent and restless most of the night, and he was anxious to leave before the rest of the house woke up.

He decided to spend the predawn hours getting their things packed and ready to go. Reiju or one of the servants had dropped off Zoro’s things during the night, so it was only a matter of making sure everything they needed got into at least one of their bags.

He paused as he opened his drawers. Usually he’d leave some clothes and things for when he came back to visit his mom, but if she never wanted to see him again then he’d have to take it all with him.

He closed his eyes, swallowed down his emotions, and made room in both his and Zoro’s bags for the extra things.

When he was finished packing, his stomach was growling. He glanced out the windows and saw the sun just starting to peek out over the horizon. He didn’t really want to leave the room and risk bumping into anyone, but he hated being hungry, and the odds of anyone being up at this hour were slim.

Zoro was still deep asleep, so he kissed his forehead, earning him a sleepy grunt in response, and wandered downstairs to the kitchen.

He wasn’t in the mood for a big project, so he simply scrambled some eggs and made some toast before taking a seat at the counter.

Halfway through his meal, the kitchen door opened. He was about to bolt, but froze when Pudding entered. She seemed just as startled to see him, and said, “Oh, you’re up early.”

“Yeah.” They stared at each other awkwardly for a few moments before Sanji stood up, “I can make you something if you want.”

“No, it’s fine,” she insisted, moving to the other side of the counter and heading for the coffee machine, “I just want some coffee. I can get it myself.”

“Alright,” he sat back down.

Silence filled the room, with Sanji focusing on his food and Pudding fiddling with the coffee machine. Suddenly the machine beeped, startling them both as Pudding’s coffee was finished. She quickly grabbed it and took a seat opposite of him.

She tapped her fingers against the mug as he stared down at his plate.

“Um,” he said after a while, “How are you holding up?”

She blinked at him, “Better than you, I imagine.”

He winced and looked away.

“I didn’t mean that to be mean,” she sighed as he looked up, “You’re too nice sometimes. Worry about yourself more.”

Sanji hummed and pushed his eggs around his plate, “Sorry.”

“No, don’t apologize,” she sighed again and sipped her coffee, “You haven’t done anything wrong. This whole situation is fucked up.”

Sanji hummed in response. He couldn’t argue with that.

“How are you doing?” she said, reaching across the counter to touch his hand, “And don’t say fine, because I know you’re not.”

“Uh, I’m getting there,” he said, slumping a little. She stroked his hand and he continued, “I kinda expected that reaction when they found out, but it’s still a little hard to take. And with my mom…” he sighed and looked away, “Everything’s all messed up,” he took a deep breath and glanced back up at her, “But, I’ll be okay. Eventually. I still have Zoro, and I still have my friends and Zeff and the Baratie.”

“I’m glad,” she said with a genuine smile on her face as she squeezed his hand and pulled away.

“How about you and Reiju?” he asked, “She mentioned that you managed to keep your relationship under wraps, but things still must be a little weird, right?”

“Me and Reiju,” she frowned, tapping out a rhythm against her mug, “Don’t worry, everyone bought our stories hook, line, and sinker. No one suspects anything.”

“Really?” Sanji was a little surprised at that, “No one questioned why two allegedly straight girls would agree to pretend to date a gay couple?”

“Not even a little,” she said as she sipped her coffee, “Heteronormativity is a hell of a drug.”

She looked down at her coffee as if it held all the answers. It was a look Sanji knew well and a feeling he was intimately familiar with, so he asked, “And, how do you feel about that?”

She sighed and rested her forehead against her hands, “I don’t know. Part of me is like, that was the whole point of this right? To keep everything a secret? You may have been outed, but as long as my status quo is maintained, everything’s good,” she winced and looked up at him, “No offense.”

“None taken,” he shook his head and took a bite of his food, “So, is there a part of you that wanted to be outed?”

“Maybe. I don’t know. I think I’m just sick of hiding, of having to go miles out of town for a date, or orchestrating some involved scheme for just a few minutes alone with my girlfriend,” she gave him a side eyed look, “Or having to pretend to date someone else for a whole weekend just to spend Christmas with her.”

“Yeah,” he tapped his fingers against the counter. He and Zoro barely made it through two days. He couldn’t imagine this being their life, “Sounds exhausting.”

“Did I tell you,” she started, tracing patterns into her mug, “I’ve been working on coming out to my family?”

He blinked, surprised. She certainly had not, “You came out to your mom?”

“God no,” her eyes went wide as she laughed, “She’d kill me on the spot. I’m not telling her unless I’m ready to leave forever and never speak to her again,” her gaze went softer, “But I did tell some of my siblings. Katakuri, Lola, Chiffon.”

“How did that go?”

“Good,” she smiled, clutching her mug as her eyes grew watery, “Really, really good. They said they loved me and accepted me and all that jazz,” she sniffled and wiped at her eyes, “It was really good.”

Sanji reached across the table to squeeze her hand. She accepted the comfort with a smile, and he smiled back, “I’m glad.”

She nodded as he pulled away, “But I didn’t tell them about Reiju. Reiju didn’t want me to, not yet, so I only told them I was bi, not that I was seeing someone,” she sighed and rested her chin in her hand, “But I want to. I want to tell everyone. I want everyone to know that Reiju’s mine and they should get their stupid green hands off of her.”

His first instinct was to defend Zoro, but Pudding was already aware that Zoro wasn’t into Reiju like that, and that really wasn’t the point here, “Have you talked to Reiju about it?”

“Yeah,” she drummed her fingers on the counter, “She said she wasn’t ready to come out yet. And I get it, I do, but,” she leaned back in her seat, “Maybe she’s ashamed to be with me.”

“That’s not true,” he said as she sipped her coffee and looked away, “You saw how everyone reacted last night. Reiju’s a practical person. All she’s ever known is the Vinsmokes and Germa Group. If she loses them then she has nothing.”

“She’d still have you.”

“Well,” he looked down at his food. He never really considered himself an asset in that way, but he knew if push came to shove he’d be there to help his sister out in a heartbeat, “Yeah, she would. But you know that’s not the same.”

“Yeah,” she sighed, taking another sip of her coffee, “But I think there’s more to it then that. It’s like she’s always holding me at arms length.”

“She’s very reserved,” he reasoned, “She has trouble letting people in, me included.”

Pudding pouted, “She didn’t have any trouble warming up to Zoro.”

He didn’t really know what to say to that other than the obvious, “You know Zoro’s gay right? Like a hundred percent not into girls?”

“So he says,” she moodily traced her finger along the rim of her mug before relenting with a sigh, “Yeah, I know. I’m being ridiculous. He’s so obviously in love with you it’s disgusting. But it’s so frustrating,” she growled and took another sip of coffee, “I had to fight and kick down all these walls before she could consider warming up to me and he gets to waltz right in.”

“It’s more complicated than that,” he assured her, “And I’m sure you breaking down those walls first helped.”

She hummed, staring at her coffee as he finished his breakfast. After a while, she said, “She thinks I’m still in love with you.”

Sanji choked on his food a little, swallowed, then said, “Oh, uh, she told you?”

“Of course not,” she frowned, tapping the mug, “She doesn't have to. It’s obvious,” she looked up at him, “I’m not, you know. Still in love with you.”

He blushed, “I never thought-”

“Yeah you did,” she smiled, and he wasn’t one to try and lie to her twice, “You must have wondered, right? After everything that happened between us why would I date your sister?”

“The thought may have crossed my mind.”

“I didn’t want to like, like her at first,” she admitted, “Being around her so much dealing with the merger kept bringing up memories about you, and I hated it. But then after a while I stopped seeing her as your sister and just saw her as her, as Reiju. And I liked what I saw.”

Sanji quietly pushed his empty dishes to the side as she continued, “I liked talking to her, I liked  _being_  with her,” she covered her eyes with her hand, “When the merger fell through I didn’t want to lose that, so I just kept seeing her. When she agreed to date me I thought it was the best thing. Now I’m not so sure.”

“Why?” his eyes narrowed, “It’s not the ace thing is it?”

She shook her head, “No, actually. I thought that would be a bigger problem, but it’s really not,” she smiled and blushed a little, “Actually, it’s really sweet. And it’s nice for once to be with someone who likes me for something other than my body. I haven’t had that since, well, you.”

It was his turn to blush, and she continued, “Of course, you weren’t really into me at all outside of being friends, I realize now, so this is much better.”

That was fair, but he still had to ask, “So, then what happened?”

She gestured around them, “This.”

Sanji waited as she took a long sip of her coffee. When she was done, she placed the mug back down and continued, “When she first proposed this scheme to me, I was so mad. It felt like some sort of test, like she was just, throwing you at me just to see how I’d react,” she grit her teeth and covered her eyes with her hand, “Like she didn’t trust me or how I felt about her.”

She took a deep breath, “So I figured if she already thought I was still in love with you, then I’d play it up as best as I could. Try to make her jealous, you know?” She lowered her hand and looked right at him, “And I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking about you at all, and it probably made you uncomfortable.”

“Oh, no,” he was quick to reassure her, “You’re fine. It wasn’t that bad.”

She gave him a small smile and shook her head, “You’re unbelievable,” and glanced back at her coffee, “And I’m sorry for riling up Zoro so much too. I still don’t like him, but I’m actually glad you’re together. You deserve to be happy,” she reached across the table and grabbed his hand again, “You deserve to be loved.”

He blushed, deciding for once to accept the comments for what they were, “Thank you.”

She squeezed his hand before pulling away, “Even if watching you two make those hopeless goo-goo eyes at each other made me want to barf.”

Sanji laughed, “Sorry, you know how I get when I’m in love.”

“You’re not sorry at all, bastard,” she grinned as he collected their dirty dishes and brought them to the sink.

As he rinsed the dishes, Pudding walked over and wrapped her arms around him in a tight hug, “Thanks. For everything.”

He quickly dried his hands and returned the hug, “Yeah, you too.”

They pulled away slowly. She smiled up at him before leaning up and giving him a quick kiss on his cheek.

“See you around, Ji-Ji. Don’t be a stranger.”

She squeezed his arm and walked out of the kitchen.

Sanji took his time finishing up the dishes, mulling over everything they’d talked about. He understood Pudding’s concerns, but he also personally knew Reiju’s hesitation, the feeling of inadequacy and inability to accept the love being offered. It took him a while before he was able to fully accept Zoro’s love for what it was, unconditional.

He put the dishes away, dried off his hands, and left the kitchen as spotless as it was before.

Reiju and Pudding would work things out, he was sure. He knew his sister cared about Pudding, both as a friend and a lover, and from what she just told him Pudding did too. They had a few hurdles to work through, but he was confident everything would be okay for them in the end.

The sun was fully risen by the time he got back to his room, but Zoro was nowhere to be found.

Wanting to get out of there as soon as possible, he grabbed their bags and made his way down to the car.

Zoro would turn up eventually.

* * *

Sora’s room was on the top floor of the house. It didn’t have a number on the door like her children did, but it did have a sign, a wooden one with with  _Mommy_ carved into it in childish scrawl and five tiny handprints on it in pink, red, blue, yellow, and green.

Zoro stared down the door like it was one of his tougher opponents. He reached out and touched the yellow handprint, letting his fingers drag over the grooves in the wood, and clutched at the little marimo jar still around his neck. With a new resolve, he took a deep breath and knocked on the door.

Sora’s maid answered, and her glare turned harsh instantly, “Oh. It’s you.”

“May I speak to Sora, please?”

“Haven’t you caused enough damage already?” she shook her head and made to close the door, “Mistress Sora is still recovering from last night’s festivities. She has no desire to see the likes of you.”

Zoro stuck his foot in the door, preventing it from closing all the way, “If it’s all the same to you, I’d like to hear that from her.”

“Absolutely not,” she tried to close the door again, but he wasn’t budging, “Mistress Sora needs her rest, not more of the undue stress that you’ll undoubtedly cause her.”

“Please,” he tried again, not one for begging but he really needed to speak with her, “It’s important.”

“No,” she put more pressure on the door, and Zoro was starting to feel it even with his shoes on, “Go away.”

“Just let me talk to her for a minute!” he was trying not to shout, but he was getting desperate, “Look, Sanji and I are leaving soon, and if she never wants to see us again she doesn’t have to, but before that-”

“Epony?” Sora said from inside the room, “Who is that?”

“Mr. Roronoa,” she responded, glaring at him once more, “He was just leaving.”

“Zoro?” there was some rustling, then, “Let him in.”

She gave him a look that could curdle milk, but opened the door and stepped aside, allowing Zoro to enter.

Her room was completely white, starkly so, and a little bigger than Reiju’s and Sanji’s. Zoro noticed a variety of medical equipment scattered across the room, and there was a striking smell of medicine in the air. The whole place reminded him more of a hospital room then a bedroom, and it set him on edge.

Sora was sitting up in her bed, back supported by about twenty pillow as her legs were tucked snuggly into the blankets. Strewn across the comforter were several crumpled up tissues.

“Good morning, Zoro,” she said, gesturing to the chair by the bed, “What brings you here so early?”

He took a seat in the chair, “Sanji wants to leave soon, so I came to say goodbye.”

“Oh,” she looked away and clutched the comforter, “Yes, alright.”

“I also came to talk to you,” he leaned forward a little, resting his elbows on his knees, “About last night.”

“What about last night?”

“You just,” he frowned, trying to find the right phrasing, “You seemed surprised.”

“I was a little blindsided,” she sighed, leaning back further into the pillows, “You told me you were dating my daughter and I suddenly find out that’s not the case. It’s hard not to feel shocked by that.”

Technically Reiju was the one who told her, but now really wasn’t the time to get caught up on technicalities, “I’m sorry about that. I didn’t want to deceive you,” he heard Epony scoff somewhere behind him, but he didn’t really care what she thought.

“If you didn’t want to deceive me,” she asked, tilting her head away and causing her bangs to cover her eyes, “why did you pretend to be with Reiju?”

“Because Sanji asked me to,” he said, remembering Sanji on the couch that night, scared and nervous as he proposed this idea to him, and how he would have done anything to make him feel better, even this, “Because I wanted to spend Christmas with him,” he leaned forward some more, trying to catch her eyes, but she refused to look up, so he took a deep breath and said, “Because I love him.”

That got her to look at him, with barely contained tears in her eyes, “Really?”

He nodded, “I’m not gonna lie to you anymore, Sora. I love Sanji a whole damn lot, enough to come here and try and put on this charade just because he asked me to,” he leaned his head against his hands, “You asked me before what I loved about Reiju, and the truth is I don’t, I just met her.”

She frowned and looked away, so he continued, desperate for her to understand, “But I love everything about Sanji, and picking just one thing that I find amazing or enthralling is like asking me to pick my favorite star in the sky.”

Sora sniffled and reached her hand across the blanket towards him. Zoro took it as she said, “Thank you for loving my son.”

He grinned and squeezed her hand gently, “He makes it easy.”

She smiled sweetly at him and pulled away.

“Um,” he rubbed his hair as he leaned away, “So, you’re not upset that Sanji’s with me?”

She shook her head, “I was certainly surprised, he’s always liked girls so much, but all I’ve ever wanted was for him to be happy. And from what I saw he looked very happy with you.”

Zoro relaxed, a weight leaving his chest upon hearing that, but it still begged the question, “So why couldn’t you look at him last night? Why haven’t you talked to him since?”

She sniffled, the tears in her eyes building up until they finally spilled over and she was full on crying.

He panicked, he was never good with crying people, and shit, he’d just made Sanji’s mom  _cry_  Sanji was gonna kill him. There was a box of tissues on the nightstand, and he scrambled to grab them and pass them to her.

She took one and blew her nose loudly, crumpling it up and tossing it onto the pile before grabbing another as she wailed, “I’m a terrible mother! The absolute worst!”

“Uh, hey,” he tried, reaching out and placing a hand on her shoulder, “It’s not, that bad?”

She hiccuped, tossing the used tissue away as she tried to wipe the tears out of her eyes, but they just kept coming, “You didn’t see him, Zoro. You didn’t see his face when I saw the picture,” she looked up at him, eyes red rimmed and still spilling tears as she sniffled, “He was so scared, absolutely terrified! And I put that look on his face! I made him feel like that!”

She sobbed, a new wave of tears coming as she looked away. Epony moved towards the bed, but before she could get there, Zoro had gotten out of the chair and settled on the bed next to her. He wrapped an arm around her shoulders and tucked her into his side, and she turned her head to cry on his shoulder.

“It’s not your fault,” he said, rubbing comforting circles into her shoulder.

“Yes it is,” she sobbed, “There was this part of him that he was too scared to show me, and that’s on me. I made him too scared. I created this environment where he couldn’t tell me something so important and,” she looked up at him with the most watery stare he’d ever seen, “How could I look him in the eye after making him feel so bad? How can I possibly live with myself?”

“He’s not scared of you,” he said as he squeezed her shoulder, “He just didn’t want to disappoint you.”

“How could he ever disappoint me by falling in love?”

He shrugged, and the room fell silent, with Zoro comforting her as she calmed down and Epony busying herself with picking up the discarded tissues.

After a while, he said again, “It’s not your fault.”

She sniffled, burying her face more, “Yes it is.”

She really was so much like Sanji.

He held her close as she continued, “I’ve always loved my children, and I try my best to show them that. I know with my husband, his love is a bit more, conditional. If they don’t fit into his mold or his plan, or he can’t force them in there,” she shuddered and shook her head, “And Sanji’s always had his own dreams and his own goals. He never quite fit in with Judge’s plans, and they’ve always resented each other. I always tried my best to protect him, to protect all of them,” she sighed and leaned further into him, “But it’s hard, when the threat is their father.”

“If Judge is so terrible,” he couldn’t help but wonder aloud, “why are you married to him?”

“He wasn’t always terrible. When we first met and got married he was actually very sweet, very doting. But he changed after he became CEO of Germa Group. The company became his life,” she shook her head and leaned more into him, “And I can’t just leave him. The scandal alone would ostracize me. I’d have nowhere to go, and with my condition,” she sighed and shook her head, “It’s just not feasible.”

They were silent for a bit, then Zoro said, “You could always stay with me and Sanji.”

“Sanji,” her eyes started watering again as she she said, “I never wanted to become another negative influence in Sanji’s life,” she sniffled and buried her face further into his shoulder, “But I couldn’t even do that.”

“You’re a lot of things to him, but a negative influence isn’t one of them,” he said as he rubbed at her shoulder, “You should talk to him.”

“How could I?” she whispered, “He probably hates me. He doesn’t want anything to do with me.”

“He doesn’t hate you, you’ve got it all wrong,” he squeezed her shoulder and gently pushed her back so he could look at her face, “He didn’t tell you he was bi because he couldn’t stand the thought of you hating him. Right now that’s exactly what he thinks, and he’s so fucking miserable.”

Her eyes went wide.

“Please,” he held her shoulders tight, practically begging, “Go talk to him. Tell him you still love him. Keep being a part of his life,” he bit his lip and looked away, “My mother couldn’t, and I haven’t spoken to her in years. He loves you so much, and I don’t,” he closed his eyes and took a deep breath before slowly opening them to look right at her, “I don’t want him to lose that. Please don’t cut him out.”

She nodded, her expression hardening as she gained new resolve, “Epony, help me get dressed.”

“Mistress, I must protest,” Epony said, “After all the excitement from last night, you’re still far too weak to be out and about.”

“That doesn’t matter,” she insisted, “Sanji needs me, and that’s far more important,” she pushed herself up and out of the bed, “If you refuse to help, Zoro will have to, and that would be extremely awkward for us both.”

She walked off towards her closet, forcing Epony to follow behind her.

Zoro grinned, shaking his head as he leaned back on the pillows.

They really were too similar.

* * *

Sanji was waiting by the car, smoking his cigarette as he stared back at the house. Where the hell was Zoro? Didn’t he know that he wanted to get out of there as soon as fucking possible? What was taking him so damn long?

He sighed, exhaling smoke and tapping his fingers against the trunk of the car as he leaned against it. He should just go look for the lost idiot.

“Hey, Three!” he heard Yonji shout. He froze as his three brothers approached, his eyes darting around for an escape.

He started making his way to the front seat of the car. Maybe if he ran them over, their screams would summon Zoro and the two of them could finally flee.

But Ichiji was there first, leaning against the door and preventing him from opening it. By that time Yonji and Niji were able to catch up to him too, boxing him in.

Trapped, he leaned against the car, puffing on his cigarette as he tried to appear as casual as he could while internally freaking the fuck out, “The fuck do you want?”

His eyes darted between the three of them. He could probably take each of them on individually, but a three on one fight was a different story. If Zoro were here the two of them could take them, so his best strategy would be to hold them off as best he could until Zoro got here, and then-

“Pretty fucked up what Father was saying last night,” Niji said, bringing all of Sanji’s thoughts to a crashing halt, “Even after you left, he just kept ranting and raving.”

Sanji’s eyes went wide as he stared at him, not saying anything.

“Yeah,” Yonji said, “I get why you didn’t wanna tell him, but we’re brothers, man,” he shoved at his shoulder, “You could’ve told us you were gay.”

“Bi,” he corrected automatically as he rubbed as his shoulder, “And why would I tell you? You hate me.”

“What? We don’t hate you,” Niji said with an aggressive shoulder pat of his own, “What gave you that idea?”

“Literally everything you’ve ever said and done to me.”

“That’s fair,” Ichiji said, looking away with a frown, “but that mostly came from misunderstanding. There’s just a lot of things about you that we just don’t get.”

“Yeah,” Yonji nodded, “Like the going out of your way to be nice to people thing.”

“And the hanging out with lower-class peasants thing,” Niji said.

“And the leaving home to cook for people thing,” Ichiji added.

“And now the liking dudes thing,” Yonji clapped a hand on his shoulder, “Which is fine.”

Sanji couldn’t believe this was happening. He still had vivid memories of the casual locker room talk and the slurs they’d sling around in high school, “Since when have you been okay with it?”

“Yeah, I’ll admit, I wasn’t the most accepting person growing up,” Yonji nodded, “but Fi’s older sister is a dy-” he cleared his throat, “A lover of women much like myself, and Fi’s super supportive of her and her lifestyle, so I’ve also been trying to become a more accepting person. And her sister’s a cool chick. We have a lot in common besides the loving women thing,” he shrugged, “Made me rethink a few things.”

Sanji stared at him, and a little smile found its way on his face. He didn’t think his brother was capable of such growth and change, but anything was possible he supposed.

“Yeah, free love and all that, it’s great. Nina’s super into that,” Niji explained, “She’s actually pansexual, which makes it sound like she likes pancakes, but apparently it just means she’s attracted to whatever. I mean, she also likes pancakes, but that’s not what the word means.”

Sanji blinked, his mouth opening wide enough that his cigarette almost fell out, “And, you’re fine with that?”

“Sure,” he shrugged, “We have an open relationship, so we can pretty much bone whoever we want with no hard feelings, and it makes for some pretty fun threesomes. Although if you are gonna bang ladies on the side, you gotta tell Zoro about it,” he turned towards him with a serious look on his face, “I found that out the hard way.”

Sanji debated for a hot second trying to explain that being attracted to more than one gender didn’t mean he couldn’t be in a monogamous relationship, but the whole discussion was already throwing him for a loop as it was, and he didn’t want to waste his last few brain cells on this, “Okay.”

“Wait, you fucking dudes too, Niji?” Yonji asked.

He shrugged, “Sometimes Nina invites other guys to bed with us, which is fine. It’s still straight as long as I’m doing the fucking.”

Sanji was going to say something, but decided against it. His brother’s sexuality was something for him to figure out and discover on his own.

“You know what it was like growing up with Father’s expectations,” Ichiji said, “As long as you were constantly fucking up and disappointing him, whenever we did stumble it didn’t seem as significant.”

“Yeah,” Niji rubbed his hair, “It was always like, ‘Father won’t hate me as long as I’m doing better than Sanji,’” he shrugged, “It’s possible we may have taken it too far.”

“After listening to Father rant last night, we realized that our treatment of you may have been unfairly harsh,” Ichiji continued, glancing over at him, “We were always more concerned with getting Father’s approval instead of your well being, and as brother’s we’ve failed you spectacularly. And for that I’m sorry.”

“Me too,” Niji added, “We haven’t always been there for you, so from now on, we’ll try to be better.”

“Same here,” Yonji nodded, “Besides, how bad can you be if you picked Zoro to go gay for?”

“Bi,” he corrected before he thought about what Yonji actually said, “Wait, you  _like_ Zoro?”

“I mean, not the way you like him, obviously,” he shrugged and bumped shoulders with him, “But yeah, he’s a cool guy. Great color taste, and he’s almost as strong as me from the looks of it. He’s like the cool older brother I’ve never had.”

“Dude,” Niji gestured at the three of them, “We’re standing right here.”

“Uh, I said cool,” Niji punched him in the arm, and Yonji punched him back before he continued, “Before everything went to shit last night I was telling Reiju that she should marry him so we could hang out more, but now I guess she can’t.”

Yonji’s eyes darted to Sanji, almost pleadingly, and he groaned, “No, I’m not going to marry Zoro just because you asked me to.”

“Aw, c’mon,” he pouted, “Just marry him so he can officially be my favorite brother.”

“You ungrateful twerp, we shared a womb!” Niji shouted, charging towards him as Yonji ran off, “You’re fucking dead!”

“Zoro would never treat me this way!” Yonji shouted back to him, “That’s why he’s my favorite!”

As they chased each other through the snow, Sanji sighed and knocked the ash off the end of his cigarette. He glanced over and noticed Ichiji was still staring at him, an unreadable expression on his face.

Before he could think of something more to say to him, Ichiji asked, “Do you know what I do for Germa Group?”

He knew his brother was an engineer of some kind, but since he couldn’t stand anything about Germa Group and what it stood for he always tuned any discussion of it out, “Uh, no, sorry.”

“I work in R&D, mostly in the lab, creating and trying out new things,” he shrugged, “It’s grunt work mostly, but I like it. I like making things.”

Sanji nodded as he took a drag from his cigarette. The art of creating, the satisfaction of seeing the completed result, those were feelings that he understood well; it was part of the reason he loved cooking so much. He didn’t think it’d be something Ichiji of all people could relate to, but maybe it was just something about him that he'd never bothered to see.

“Lately Father’s been trying to push me out of the lab,” he continued, “Put me more into upper management,” he looked down at the ground, ”He’s been grooming me for it my whole life, so I’m not really surprised, but…” he trailed off, kicking his heel against the front tire.

“You want to stay in the lab,” Sanji finished for him. He nodded as Sanji exhaled smoke and said, “Well, fuck him then. Do what you want. If he won’t let you keep engineering at Germa, go someplace else that will. Or better yet, make your own company. Then you can do whatever you want.”

He smirked, “It’s not that easy. Not everyone can just leave everything they’ve ever known and start a new life,” and looked up at his brother, “That’s a quality of yours I’ve always envied.”

Sanji looked away, taking the compliment for what it was as he felt something warm build up in his chest. It was probably the nicest thing Ichiji had ever said to him.

They fell into silence for a few moments, with Sanji quietly smoking his cigarette as the other two screeched in the background, resorting to chucking snowballs at each other instead of punching.

He inhaled deeply and exhaled smoke, mulling over whether to bring this up, not wanting to shatter whatever moment they were having here, but he figured Ichiji at least had the right to know. Eventually he built up enough resolve to say, “Uh, so, in the spirit of brotherly bonding or whatever the fuck this is,” he kicked around some of the gravel, “I feel like I should tell you, uh. Last night Dani kinda,” he waved his hand and gnawed on the cigarette filter, “made a move on Zoro?”

He quickly glanced up at him, but Ichiji was as impassive as ever, only acknowledging his words with a soft hum.

“I mean, to be fair, Nina did too,” he continued, babbling now that the words were out, “But apparently Niji’s cool with that? I don’t know if you have some kind of arrangement with her or something, but I just, you know,” he rubbed the back of his head, “I thought that you should know.”

After a pause, Ichiji responded, “Thank you for telling me.”

His voice didn’t waver, his expression didn’t change. As always it was hard to tell just what he was thinking, “Did you already know?”

“No,” he admitted with a shrug, “But I’m not surprised. Our relationship isn’t based on things like affection or attraction. We both come from good families and we’re a good match,” he looked over at him, and Sanji was struck by the intensity of the gaze, “I can’t imagine myself defending her the way Zoro did for you or vice versa, outside a point of pride. If she needs something outside of our relationship that I can’t provide her, then I can’t begrudge her to look for it.”

Sanji took a long drag from his cigarette before saying, “You’re not as heartless as you think you are. You deserve to be happy too.”

His eyes went wide, and he looked away before saying, “We can’t all be you.”

Before he could respond, a pair of arms wrapped around him from behind. He turned and saw Reiju smiling at him, “Hey.”

“Hey,” she replied, “How are you doing?”

“Good, fine,” the look she give him wasn’t convinced, and he inhaled from his cigarette before saying, “Better.”

She pulled away, ruffling his hair as she handed him a small present, “Here, since you’re not going to be around to open presents.”

He cradled it carefully as he accepted it, “Thank you.”

“Right,” Ichiji dug into his jacket pocket and pulled out his own present to hand to him, “Here.”

“Did the other two give you theirs yet?” Reiju asked, glancing around the driveway, “Where are they?”

Just then a stray snowball was launched in their direction. They all managed to dodge as it smacked the side of Sanji’s car, the excess water and snow dripping down the window.

“Honestly,” Reiju grumbled as she stood up and grabbed a swatch of snow to form into two perfectly round snowballs. After some careful aiming she pelted her brothers’ heads with precision accuracy.

“Hey! Sanji’s leaving!” she shouted as they turned to frown at her, rubbing their heads, “Give him your shit!”

They responded with more snowballs, one of which hit Ichiji, causing him to return fire and create what was quickly turning into an all-out snowball war between the siblings. Sanji worked his way to the trunk of his car, popping it and putting the presents inside.

He heard more footsteps crunching across the gravel, and he looked up to see Zoro finally making his way over, carefully escorting his mother.

He quickly dropped his cigarette on the ground and put it out with his foot as they approached.

Why was Zoro bringing his mom? Wasn’t one rejection enough to last a lifetime? Why would he drag this out and put him through this again?

“Hey,” he said, trying to sound as casual as he could while inside he was screaming. His eyes were focused on the ground, his heart pounding hard enough to burst through his chest as he ran a hand through his hair, “Don’t worry, we’re leaving now, so-”

The rest of his sentence was cut off when she surged forward and wrapped her arms around him in a tight hug.

“I’m sorry,” she sobbed into his chest, “I’m so sorry.”

Sanji was frozen to the spot, shocked by her actions but not really sure what was going on or what to do. He glanced over at Zoro, who was leaning against the car as stoic as ever, being absolutely useless and no help at all.

“I didn’t,” she paused, squeezing him a little tighter before she continued, “I never wanted to make you feel so terrible about yourself, because you’re perfect just as you are.”

He held his breath, not quite believing her words but wanting them to be true regardless.

“I’m sorry that I didn’t make that clear last night. I just,” she inhaled sharply and clutched at his back, “I never wanted to be the kind of person you couldn’t be yourself around, and when I found out I was I just…”

She pulled away, reaching up to cradle his face with her hands, “You are my  _son_ , and I love you,” she said, rubbing at his cheekbones with her thumbs, “I’ll always love you, and I don’t care who you love.”

He felt tears trickling down his face, and he didn’t even care that Zoro and his brothers were watching him cry. His mom accepted him. His mom still loved him.

Everything was still okay.

He leaned forward and hugged her tight, hiding his face against her shoulder as he let his relieved tears flow.

“Thank you,” he muttered as he felt her arms wrap around him once more, “I’m sorry I-”

“Sanji, don’t you ever apologize for being your wonderful, beautiful self,” she admonished in his ear, “Not to me, not to anyone.”

He smiled and nodded, pulling away a bit so he could wipe away some of his tears. Suddenly he felt more arms wrap around him and looked around to see Reiju again. She smiled up at him and he smiled back.

“Yeah!” Yonji shouted as he barreled over and threw his arms around Sanji and their mom, “Group hug time!”

Niji joined them too, encasing his arms around Reiju and their mom before glancing over at their last brother, “C’mon, Ich, it’s a group hug! Get in on this!”

Ichiji stood near Zoro off to the side, shuffling awkwardly, “I’m good.”

“Worst brother ever!” Yonji shouted.

Ichiji’s eyebrow twitched, and he made his way over to his family. He lifted his hand and rested it gently on his mom’s back.

That wasn’t enough for his brothers, who immediately shifted their arms around until they forced him into the hug, squeezing them all together until they were all laughing.

Sanji laughed too, for once happy to be part of this stupid family.

* * *

Zoro had assumed Sanji would want to spend the rest of the evening at home after all that excitement, but when word had spread to their friends that they were suddenly obligation free for Christmas, they instead found themselves at Robin and Franky’s with the rest of the gang.

It was his preferred way to spend Christmas anyway,  surrounded by friends.

Towards the end of the evening he found himself flopped on the couch nursing an eggnog. Luffy had dragged Sanji off somewhere, Franky, Brook, and Jinbei had burst into a patchwork of Christmas carols, Usopp was telling the story of how he single-handedly saved Christmas to Chopper, who was listening in complete awe as Robin observed them, amused but silent, and Nami and Vivi were curled up on the chair next to him.

He smiled at the chaos happening around him. It was perfect.

“That’s new,” Nami said, pointing at the marimo necklace, “Where’d you get that?”

He shrugged, a little self conscious as he took a sip of his drink, “It’s just a present.”

“Aw, it's cute,” Vivi glanced at him too, “Who gave it to you?”

“Sanji, right?” Nami grinned, staring at the jar, “Sanji got you a little marimo?”

He felt his face heat up and looked away, “Maybe.”

“Of course he did,” she laughed, “Unless the Vinsmokes got it for you. But why would they?" she poked his cheek, "You're not their Marimo."

His blushed deepened and he took another sip, trying his best to ignore her.

"Oh, and speaking of,” she leaned over the arm of the couch to smirk at him, “The Vinsmokes. How was it?”

He shrugged, “S’alright. Reiju was nice. The brothers were whatever. Sora’s great,” he took another sip from his drink, “Judge is a fuckass.”

“Yes,” Vivi slurred as she leaned more into Nami, “I’ve been saying it for years.”

Nami wrapped an arm more securely around her waist and kissed her temple.

“You gonna go next year?” she asked him, raising her eyebrow.

“Hell no,” Zoro laughed, “Doubt Judge will let us within a hundred feet of the house,” he swirled his drink, “But Sora was saying she might come to the Baratie instead. And who knows? Maybe by next year Reiju can just bring Pudding herself.”

Just then Luffy burst from the kitchen holding a plate of cookies and shouted, “Cookie time!”

There was a rush of everyone scrambling for some cookies, but Zoro was content to stay right where he was.

Sanji emerged from the kitchen with his own cookie and eggnog and planted himself right on Zoro’s lap, “Hi.”

“Hi,” he replied, and as soon as he opened his mouth Sanji shoved the cookie in it.

He chewed on it moodily, he didn’t really like sweet things, but as he kept eating it he found that it was covered in dark chocolate and peppermint and wasn’t all that sweet.

Sanji grinned, “You like?”

He nodded and grabbed his waist, pulling him closer. When he was done, he swallowed and asked, “What’s with the cookies?”

“Luffy wanted cookies. Well, I think Luffy really wanted to make sure I was okay after, you know,” he waved his hand, and placed his eggnog on the table, ”Everything. And he probably wanted cookies too.”

“He’s good like that,” Zoro smiled, putting his drink down as well as he leaned in for a kiss.

Sanji kissed him back and hummed, closing his eyes and falling into it as his hands sank into Zoro’s hair. After a few moments he pulled away and said, “I like this.”

“Yeah,” he rubbed circles into his hips with his thumbs, “I do to.”

He hummed again and kissed his cheek, muttering into his ear, “I like kissing you.”

Zoro laughed, “Are you drunk?”

“‘M fine, mostly just tipsy,” Sanji found his way back to his lips and kissed him again, and he couldn’t help but grin as he kissed him back.

“You two want a room or something?” Franky said, causing them to pull apart.

“Franky, did you know?” Sanji asked as he cradled Zoro’s face, “Zoro’s the best boyfriend ever.”

Franky smirked as Zoro blushed, “Is he now?”

“Yup,” he grinned down at him, his eyes full of nothing but affection, and Zoro blushed even more, “He dated my sister and told off Judge and made my mom love me,” he leaned down and pecked his lips, “He’s the best. I love him a lot.”

Zoro groaned and buried his face in Sanji’s chest. He kinda hated how overly affectionate Sanji got when he was drunk, but he also kinda loved it.

Sanji glanced back up at Franky as he started stroking Zoro’s hair, “You can’t have him.”

Franky laughed, “No worries, dude. He’s all yours.”

“Damn straight he is,” he giggled, “Or I guess, damn bi.”

“You’re the damn bi,” Zoro muttered as he pulled away.

Sanji was smiling so sweetly at him, he couldn’t help but lean forward and kiss him again. He’d meant to keep it short and sweet, but Sanji opened his mouth and let one hand slid down his chest, and he wasn’t going to refuse an invitation like that.

“Anyway, guest room’s open if you guys want it, just saying,” Franky said as he left them alone, “Go nuts.”

Eventually, Zoro pulled away, “You want the room? Or do you wanna go home?”

Sanji hummed as he thought about it, “Home.”

He stood up and grabbed his hand, pulling him to his feet as they quietly made their way to the door.

Just as they opened the door, Usopp shouted, “Ooh, mistletoe!”

They both looked up at the mistletoe that had been hung in the doorway, and the entire room started chanting, “Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!”

Sanji grinned, grabbing the back of his head and pulling him eagerly into one more kiss. Zoro sighed into it, closing his eyes and wrapping a hand around his waist to pull him even closer.

The room cheered as they pulled away. Sanji flashed him a satisfied smirk as Zoro grabbed his hand and led him out the door.

Their intertwined hands swung between them as they walked down the street towards their apartment. The snow swirled around them, and if Zoro were the romantic type he’d almost call it magical.

“I meant it, you know,” Sanji said. Zoro glanced over at him and he grinned, “You really are the best.”

He smiled, “You’re worth it.”

Sanji leaned in and kissed him softly. Zoro let him for a few moments, but as the snow started to stick to their jackets Sanji shivered and pulled away.

As they started walking again Zoro thought back to the weekend. Yeah, everything turned out alright with Sora’s acceptance and all, but the whole thing still ended up being kinda a mess, and whatever status quo Sanji had been pretending to have with the Vinsmokes and that world was shot to hell.

“You’re really okay, right?” he asked, just to make sure, “I mean, with how everything turned out?”

“Of course I’m okay,” he said, swinging their hands a little as he smiled, “I’m with you.”

Zoro grinned, feeling Sanji lean more into him as they made their way home.


End file.
